Lovebird

It's a variant of a username I have on a different app (the 'e' is replaced with the number 3). I love birds and I was thinking of them at the time of making it, there's also an old saying of calling a lovey-dovey couple a pair of lovebirds, and I'm romance favourable, so it's double the pun. 

Xenogenders are pogchamp!! I use several, but my favourite in my collection is birdgender. 

I don't care about it. My boyfriend and I celebrate our love everyday, so it's useless to me. 

Most modern holidays to me are no longer about hanging out and caring for other people, it's all about big companies blowing your money away on pointless items. 

I haven't labled myself as an particular faith (yet), I just believe in God like a deist does. Though I'm getting super into Sikhism and am into tarot & astrology related things. And I love learning about other peoples religions.   

I have difficulties telling if I am experiencing romantic, sexual or aesthetic attraction because they're similar in feeling for me. 

Do I have a crush? Probably. Does it matter? I don't know. 

I don't want much, to be honest. I've noticed as I get older, I think a lot less about what I want for birthdays and Christmases, though I'm sure that's normal -- my older family members are the same. 

I'd give some gifts, but current circumstances make it hard. I feel a bit guilty every time I don't give my parents a present, they gift me presents every year even when I don't ask for anything :(  

Welcome :D 

Weirdcore and liminal spaces. I also enjoyed pastel goth in its heyday. 

On 11/7/2021 at 1:10 PM, DeltaV said:

Alcohol itself doesn’t really have a taste, it just burns. There are thousands of different alcoholic drinks in the world and it depends on the non-alcohol content how they taste.

You can’t compare drugs that easily. Tobacco in the form of the modern cigarette is … well you know, highly addictive. Alcohol OTOH is the oldest recreational drug, so humanity has some experiences with it…

It’s a rather dull drug, though. Alcohol (ethanol) is an extremely simple molecule, that just causes a nonspecific effect of your brain going haywire.

You also need an ENORMOUS amount of ethanol to feel an effect. We’re talking 20 grams here. That amount of nearly any other recreational drug – including caffeine – would kill you.

I wasn't saying tobacco and alcohol are literally the same, I'm saying being around family members has substantially affected my personal choice. Why do you care so much? 

2 hours ago, roboticanary said:

There were rumours it had meat in it when I was young. Probably false, in reality it is made of pure regret.

 

Oh this is true. Where I'm from it is not the worst but it is still very uncomfortable seeing how expected drinking is, especially for young guys.

And that's on being Australian. Addiction is not taken seriously at all. Peer pressure isn't really a thing here though thankfully, though you're considered kind of 'odd' if you haven't even had one pint. And from what I know, it seems young people don't drink as much as opposed to maybe 20 years ago. 

I remember as soon as I turned 18 I wanted to try all the alcoholic drinks. Now I don't drink at all because I'm tired of my countries romantisation of alcohol dependency and constant 'joking' of alcoholism - Plus the taste isn't that great and I feel a bit buzzy after just one drink. I think this influenced my views from seeing my parents become smoking addicts over time and I don't want anything like that looming over me too.    

Probably the fact my ex was toxic ?

It turned me off romantic relationships for a while.

I'm with someone else now who makes me much happier. But sometimes I wondered what I did wrong previously.  

Of course! I'm greyromantic and look at fanart and fanfiction of my favourite couple all the time, and am attracted to fictional characters. I just don't always have the attraction to be "interested" in real people. 

This thread was made for me. 

I was never a fan of the big, extravagant weddings. I'd prefer just a small wedding with maybe a handful of friends (probably not family as both my boyfriends and ours family relationship is strained). 

I don't really like engagement or wedding rings though I love promise rings 

I'm gonna attempt to break every rule possible, "only the bride can wear white!!" Fuck you, my dress will be electric blue & there will be no best man, just best girl 

I tell my boyfriend I love him, because I legitimately do. I don't say it to my friends though as I'm aplatonic and I don't love my friends that way.  

Currently in a romantic LDR with my boyfriend of 4-5, who also happens to be arospec.

We're both romance - favourable aros, we talk about shipping & fanfiction a lot so that's fun lol

Though it's difficult as I often feel not really aro for being in a romantic relationship. I personally think romance-favourable aros, greyros, demiros ect arn't taken seriously and are considered 'allo lite', if you're an aro in a romantic relationship, you're considered a weirdo or 'crazy' 

I'm a romance-favourable aro, though I don't focus on more mainstream romance like that on TV as I found that a bit boring. Romance in fanfiction & shipping in general is much, much more interesting to me, especially if the ship is not canon in the actual story. I find the storylines more interesting than any soap opera. I'm not interested in friendship or platonic shipping because I am aplatonic, it doesn't do things for me. 

Irl, I do actually have a boyfriend whose also arospec, we've been together for 4-5 years. It's long distance, and we're going really strong but I often wonder what it's going to be like once we've met up. He's very affectionate while I'm not as much, it's going to be an interesting dynamic lol.

I don't really feel welcome in a lot of aro spaces because of those things and often worry if I'm faking it. I worry I'd be kicked out of IRL aro spaces because of it. 

I'm getting really sick of the aro community armchair diagnosing people as mentally ill because they experience something ya'll don't. I'm greyromantic and in an actual romantic relationship with someone, who just so happens to also be arospec, does that make me a psychopath according to ya'll? Not only this, it's also ableist as fuck as it implies actual mentally ill people are 'faking' their attraction or are 'delusional' for thinking someone would love them. My boyfriend, who has actual, multiple, severely stigmatised mental illnesses, is the most loving, kind, person I have ever met. His love, not just for me, but for his hobbies & interests are the most authentic thing I've ever seen. 

People also experience 'drug' like symptoms when it comes to any positive emotion, it's psychology 101. I've seen other aros describe platonic attraction as nearly like that, but I'm aplatonic and never related to that. Does that make me crazy too?

Stop acting like people can just turn off their attraction (or lack thereof) like a light switch, that's not how it works.    

POV YOU ROLEPLAY KARKAT 

4 hours ago, vinniebandit said:

Just a couple of thoughts. I would venture that most (if not all) aros (by any description) are rather self-sufficient (I'm trying to find the right nuance here from my original French, translation is always chancy), so your idea of "best having a quiet time" would be within the spectrum of what's expectable.

Aromantic culture: does such a thing really exist? even as a sub-culture? Honestly I have no idea but then again I haven't been paying attention to that for long enough (or have been involved in too much of a quiet time ?

 I should've phrased it as 'alone time', it makes more sense. I have a tendency to experience social fatigue from interacting with people for too long.

As for 'aromantic culture' I was referring what is common experiences or thoughts in the aro community, or common flags and symbols. Or even memes. And I say I feel like I don't 'fit in' it's because my experiences are different from everyone else in the community -- and that I'm not valid for it 

I am greyromantic, and have been for a number of years. Here are my observations for realising I was: 

• Besides obviously rarely experiencing romantic attraction, I also noticed that if I did like someone, the attraction would feel rather 'weak'.  People would describe their romantic feelings as rather intense, meanwhile mine were quite less in comparison 
• Not knowing the difference between platonic & romantic feelings. "Does this person like me that way? do I like them back? I cannot differentiate and I am not going to try!" It also doesn't help I'm questioning if I'm aplatonic, but that is a story for another day    Also I'll often 'forget' I like someone, then my brain is like "Hey remember that person? They're cute" and I'm like "Oh yeah.. I do have a thing for them, don't I?" 
• Not actively perusing romantic relationships, regardless if I like them that way or not. This also may tie into the fact I'm neurodiverse as well, affecting the way I socialise with people could also be another factor. Dating websites don't do much for me either, though I have used them, I want actual relationship with feelings and not one where I'm lying about my aromantisicity to make my partner happy 
• Romantic culture doesn't always make sense to me. Maybe it's just me but my ideas of dating are different compared to most people, I'm not a fan of fancy stuff people do on dates and such, I prefer some quiet time with my partner or space to myself. But I also feel like I don't fit within aromantic culture, but that's another story   

2 hours ago, crazydreamer said:

I hate that! It makes it so annoying when people treat other's like children, like we can't handle ourselves. Like Sia's movie.  Ugh. Yes we need help sometimes but so do all humans. Neurodivergence is too stigmatised.  On a brighter note, my favourite fidget toy is this one, I don't know what it's called but I really like it because it's silent and I can do it mindlessly. Here's the link for it: https://www.etsy.com/listing/266708061/fidget-toy-great-for-focus-autism-adhd?ga_order=most_relevant&ga_search_type=all&ga_view_type=gallery&ga_search_query=fidget+toys&ref=sr_gallery-1-14&organic_search_click=1&frs=1&bes=1&col=1

 

 

I also have a critique regarding the neurodiverse community 'forgetting' people with intellectual disabilities when it's convenient for them, they'll talk how IQ is problematic yet talk bad about those with cognitive disorders, either with insults or making themselves superior "at least we're not like those guys!!" and romanticising gifted & talented programs, saying things like "if you were in gifted, you're probably ND!!" and thinking there's no issues of class, competivity, pressure, or disability divide these programs at all. 

I am autistic and cognitively/intellectually disabled. I am look for other people with IDs to befriend, but it's difficult as we are a minority of a minority. I also think I have ADHD. I wasn't diagnosed till I was 15-16, however people suspected something was 'odd' about me when I was 5, but my mum never bothered to seek a diagnosis for me. My hyperfixtations are birds & Jojos Bizzare Adventure. My favourite sensory toys are tangle plastic toy, fidget cubes and my recent favourites is the push & pop -- made popular from the internet, because of course. The biggest misrepresentation that bothers me? people treating those with IDs like babies. Not only do NTs do this but also other NDs too, to make themselves 'superior' because they're 'smarter' -- I hate when they use that as an excuse 

My boyfriend, who is also arospec, and I do want kids in the future -- both biological and adopted 

I've had on and off 'crushes' (or squishes, I cannot tell) of a few internet celebrities over the years, they all have something in common: 'nerdy' gamer men who are streamers or musicians, or both.

The 'oldest' have been Dan Avidan from the lets play channel Game Grumps who is the lead singer of the his own band: Ninja Sex Party, and Joel from streaming and gaming group, Vinesauce. Who has been a leader & member of several heavy metal bands over the years, with a part time current solo career (I have listened to his work and it's very good, this is coming from someone who doesn't listen to the genre very often) 

Most recent is Jerma, another gaming streamer who is good friends with Joel, though he is not a musician as far as I know. And Neil Cicierega, the solo singer of his band Lemon Demon, who you may know from his other works. Dudes an internet sensation machine. 

And some Kpop idols and artists, because of course