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Erederyn

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Everything posted by Erederyn

  1. I experience sensual attraction as a separate thing (it can be tied to aesthetic for me, though). For me, it's different from sexual- being physically close to someone doesn't mean that I'll want to have sex with them. When I am physically affectionate with someone I am sensually attracted to, I get !!! but not in a sexual way- that's it, I don't want to have sex with them. I view sensual attraction in the same way as Blake, "actions that have no further consequences," but for others, sensual attraction can also lead/be related to sexual attraction/actions. So I guess it depends on if those se
  2. Aromanticism has helped me to feel empowered in making life how I want it to be. I feel that there are so many more possibilities and that I'm not obligated to follow a certain path. I can customize and develop relationships according to what I want (with consent of the other person involved, of course) without having to wedge myself or my relationships into a specific box. It's also helped me learn a lot about how varied the human experience can be and drives me to fight even harder for a society in which people can have the freedom to express this vast diversity of humanity.
  3. Hello and welcome! I'm also studying psychology, doing a PhD in psychopathology and cognitive functions. Nice to meet a fellow psych grad student 👋
  4. Hey there, I understand that this can be confusing if aromanticism is foreign to you. Being aromantic does not necessarily mean that someone can't be affectionate or that someone can't love (although there are aromantics who do not experience affection or love aka loveless). There are different ways to love someone that is not romantic and sometimes it can look like romance if someone is unaware of this. Being intimate, affectionate, or emotionally (even physically) close to someone is not inherently romantic. An important distinction to make is that there is a difference between attraction an
  5. Wecome! Besides uplifting Rainy Robin's good advice and answer, you might want to look into noetiromantic. https://lgbta.wikia.org/wiki/Noetiromantic
  6. Round-up is posted! https://graces-of-luck.tumblr.com/post/647291831991828480/carnival-of-aros-round-up-march-2021
  7. Welcome, nice to meet you! Hahaha, I feel this ~ It can feel odd sometimes when others around me are "moving on" with their lives and I'm just chillin, not sure how my future will look like. I'm almost 30, so I sometimes feel like an oldie with the younger people in the aro community, but it's also exciting to see that people are able to find out about aromanticism when younger. Yay for increasing visibility! Anyway, I hope you enjoy your time here!
  8. Hello and welcome! It can definitely be hard to understand feelings. There's quite some stuff online on aromanticism, so I get that it can be daunting diving into it. I'm not sure what you've searched up already, but perhaps further diving into the different aro labels and types of attractions can be a good next step (AUREA has some good resources here if you haven't check it out yet). Reading about people's experiences or talking to others can also be helpful! A good thing to remember is that while there may be a "set" definition for something, people can have varying relationships and experi
  9. Erederyn

    AVEN

    Would something like this help? It's just a list of sexualities. - https://sexuality.fandom.com/wiki/List_of_Sexualities - https://aminoapps.com/c/lgbt-best/page/item/big-list-of-sexualities/g4qr_b3cKIGrdr4ZneNx2WkabXmDkpxpnm There's also this specifically for ace-spec identities: https://lgbta.wikia.org/wiki/Asexual_Spectrum
  10. Welcome! It definitely can be tricky figuring out one's orientations. People here are generally helpful with these sorts of things (or at least willing to engage), so feel free to ask questions and express your experiences! I hope you find what you need here and best of luck on your journey :)
  11. I feel similarly! I also don't feel that single really applies to me because of the reasons you describe. I think it also negates all the relationships that I do have in my life because single makes it sound like just because I don't have a (romantic) partner, I don't have anyone at all in your life, which is untrue. I hadn't thought of having an aromantic word to replace "single". I think that would be hard, though, because I think it would still be a relationship status for a particular kind of relationship even if it's not romantic. So I would still feel strange because then I'd only
  12. I was thinking, maybe we could discuss other forms of attraction (non-romantic, non-sexual) as a topic for April? Inspired by the TAAAP discussion on platonic attraction for their pride chats this month.
  13. Agreed, I don't think it'd really work to just take something like a wedding ceremony and make it for friends, there would have to be some original ceremony. Blood mention: Hahah, yes, we'll make greeting card companies so rich, they'll have to recognize us! I'd probably turn friendship day into a friendship weekend, honestly 😁 I'd organize a weekend getaway for us to spend some quality time together in a nice area. We'd have a nice dinner planned (where we can dress up if we want to because why not?). It'd be a time to reminisce and appreciate each other. If they w
  14. I suppose it depends on the kind of the struggle, but one thing you could do is think about how most struggles do tend to end or lessen at some point. It's not forever and things can get better. I personally like to focus on the things I can improve- it can even be something small. You could also think on how you've overcome adversities in the past and feel some strength and pride in that. Sometimes when I'm struggling I think about how, despite the adversities I've faced, I managed to make a relatively nice life for myself, even if there are still things I want to improve. Being grateful for
  15. I'm hosting CoA this month on intersectionality and inclusivity, including race/ethnic minorities. It would be great to get the perspectives of aro people of color!! https://graces-of-luck.tumblr.com/post/644436639587893250/carnival-of-aros-call-for-submissions-march-2021
  16. I agree, there are many ways to celebrate friendships! It's nice to read about the different ways you all do that 😊 I used to do friendship anniversaries more often when I was younger, but most of my friends have outgrown this. And I think even just planning a nice lunch or fun day out together can definitely be a way to celebrate. But yeah, there's nothing big that is a recognized form of celebrating a friendship. Not that public recognition is necessary to treasure your friends (like I said, a lot of those things tend to be very performative anyway), but sometimes I see how people treat
  17. I resonate with your experience. I also discovered aromanticism through asexuality- it was then that I realized that what I thought was due to asexuality was actually due to aromanticism. After learning more about aromanticism, I felt a lot more sure about that than my sexuality. I still find my sexuality a bit ambiguous and hard to describe whereas my aromanticism feels concrete, which is why I identify as aroqueer.
  18. Do you wish there were some sort of ceremony or event to celebrate your friendships? Romantic relationships are often celebrated with anniversaries, engagement parties, weddings, and so forth. People often congratulate couples when they start a romantic relationship or move in together or get married. But people don't do that for friends. Of course, you could always decide yourself to celebrate your friendships, but I suppose the difference is that these often do not get the public recognition that a wedding would, if that makes sense. Or do you find any such sort of ceremony or celebration wo
  19. I get this feeling, and I think it's a sentiment that some other aros can relate to. The lack of stability also scares me, and I do feel sad knowing that people I care about wouldn't be willing to prioritize me in the same way I do them. So you're definitely not alone in feeling this way. I also struggle with determining boundaries in friendships (is it okay if I cuddle them, is it okay to ask them for help with certain things...?). I have brought this up with close friends and they were pretty receptive to discussing the relationship, although all within the boundaries of typical friends
  20. Hello, nice to meet you too! I totally agree with you that dragons are awesome, I'm a big fan.
  21. That's great, I'm really happy for you! 🎉
  22. Hello, welcome to the forum! Arocalypse has definitely been helpful to many in figuring their feelings and identities out, so I hope it helps you as well. I hope you enjoy being here and make some new friends.
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