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Apathetic Echidna

Being a Wedding Guest

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I was invited to a wedding and I was sort of dreading it. I was wondering how I would react to everything now I know more about myself (I was 12 when I went to the last wedding, and being a kid I got away with running around on the lawn when I got bored). Happily there was a nice requirement of no +1, so no dates were allowed. And it was a family wedding rather than one of my friends meaning there were very few people under the age of 30 and certainly no one else was all lovey dovey or planning their own wedding. Basically it felt like a formal family gathering rather than a 'marriage event' so I had quite a good time even though I did feel very unsure about the appropriate etiquette sometimes.  

 

I know some of my friends will be getting married in the next few years and I am just wondering about the differences between a family wedding and a friend's wedding. Any tips and helpful hints on how to not seem completely repulsed would be very welcome. Hopefully this topic can turn into a 'Wedding Survival Guide' that other people can use when the events come up. 

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A "wedding survival guide" sounds great! My sister is engaged and has asked me to be Maid of Honour at her wedding. There is no part of it that I'm not dreading!

 

I've been to a few friends' weddings as well as family weddings, and not really noticed a difference between the two. I wouldn't worry about seeming repulsed at weddings. All eyes will be on the bride, so people are unlikely to notice unless you're actually making gagging noises! To make it all more palatable, try to focus on the non-romantic aspects of a wedding. There's usually something to enjoy, whether it's the food, the music, the crazy hats, etc. 

 

Also, there are often opportunities to escape for a while. A friend of mine got married at a stately home that had these beautiful grounds, so while she was getting her make-up done I went for a walk and climbed a tree. :) So I guess the best advice I can give is to wear sensible shoes so you can take advantage of escape opportunities!

 

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Just sit back and watch the fireworks!

 

And by fireworks, I actually mean people in weird clothes trying to act like they're comfortable in said clothes.

 

Seriously, who ever thought it would be a good idea to wear a cummerbund?

Why does anyone even make those?

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4 hours ago, James White said:

Seriously, who ever thought it would be a good idea to wear a cummerbund?

Why does anyone even make those

I've always wondered about those. They look so uncomfortable, like man-corsets.

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I've been to a few weddings of friends. While there were definitely cringey moments, I tried to focus on how happy my friend looked. The weddings were also like mini-reunions of other friends from our group that I hadn't seen in a while, so that also helped. Also the food - there was some really good stuff there.

 

The worst part of it was noise: the music was SO LOUD there was no way people could communicate inside, so we actually spent quite some time outside, which was nice.

 

I went with my friend/roommate. I guess taking a friend to a wedding is one of the best ways to get people to think you're a couple, if for some weird reason that's your goal. :rofl:

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17 hours ago, SoulWolf said:

I went with my friend/roommate. I guess taking a friend to a wedding is one of the best ways to get people to think you're a couple, if for some weird reason that's your goal. :rofl:

so I guess the reverse logic is true, to make sure people don't put you in a 'in a relationship' box go by yourself? but then would you be dodging the partner questions all night....I guess it depends on the crowd, I (obviously) went unpartnered as did all of my cousins and no one asked us anything about that. I guess they all hear it through the family gossip grapevine so being face to face is reserved for the important things like small talk, rants, reminiscing, embarrassing stories and jokes. 

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On 3/4/2018 at 5:46 AM, Skittles87 said:

I've always wondered about those. They look so uncomfortable, like man-corsets.

 

I don’t know if it’s true, but I was told that cummerbunds were originally worn to dinners, and that the pleats go up so they can catch breadcrumbs. I guess people kept all sorts of stuff in there though.

 

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On 13/03/2018 at 10:51 PM, Kickaxe said:

so they can catch breadcrumbs

snacks for later

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All of the weddings I've been to have been obnoxiously straight....and all the talk about love mixed with cringey bible verses got on my nerves.  It's just the ceremony that really bugs me; the reception is typically decent because I like both food and dancing.

Three of my cousins are getting married before the end of the year! And two of them have only gotten engaged since christmas, and have been dating for less than a year at this point....I'm just kinda exasperated with how allo & straight all my cousins are.  Though, I plan to make a point of NOT wearing a dress to these weddings if I can help it, so that will be an improvement over the previous weddings I've been to.  

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If you would like to share some things you discovered/found helpful while reflecting after the events @Magni it might help other members in the future 

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good point! I'm going to one cousin's bridal shower this weekend and then next weekend I'm going to a different cousins wedding.....so I'll report back afterwards lol (wish me luck:) 

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