Firebird Posted August 1, 2023 Share Posted August 1, 2023 On the 29th of July I realized I am aromantic. During pride month I attended a few marches, and for the first time, was able to connect with fellow lesbians on a larger scale. I wanted more lesbian interaction, so I started going to lesbian bars, had a few hookups, but then I started noticing how surprised people kept acting that I go to the lesbian bar primarily to hook up, and the I am not looking for any romantic relationships at all. These kind of reactions pushed me to introspection. I started questioning whether I'm aromantic or not, and eventually, after talking over about what even romantic feelings are with some alloromantic friends and acquaintances, and especially after talking it over with my demiromantic friend, I came to the conclusion that I don't experience romantic attraction at all. Basically, all this time, whenever I would experience platonic attraction and sexual attraction at the same time, I mistakenly thought that is romantic attraction, though nothing could be farther from the truth. My biggest gripe today is overcoming some internalized arophobia I've developed over the years, especially aroallophobia that comes at me in a multipronged attack. Being a baby aro, I am still trying to figure out what aromanticism means to me, since it comes in many forms, and trying to figure out how how to navigate relationships from here, because queer platonic relationships sound really appealing to me. All in all, it feels very liberating that I now understand that romance always has been perfectly optional, but the fear of social non acceptance is still something that haunts me. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Isa1116 Posted August 1, 2023 Share Posted August 1, 2023 Hello and welcome! I'm Isa and I hope you have a great time here! :) I also have internalized aroallophobia when I think I might be it. I'm still figuring myself out even though I've known I'm a-soec for awhile but congrats on figuring yourself out anyways! :)))) 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jot-Aro Kujo Posted August 1, 2023 Share Posted August 1, 2023 Welcome. It’s definitely tough realizing you’re allo aro, but you’re not alone, at least. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Newest Fabled Creature Posted August 1, 2023 Share Posted August 1, 2023 (edited) Hello! It can be hard accepting being aro, and especially aroallo, I went through similar stuff myself in that regard. You're not alone, and it's okay to not be okay with yourself after finding out. Edited August 1, 2023 by The Newest Fabled Creature 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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