NullVector Posted September 22, 2017 Share Posted September 22, 2017 On 01/09/2016 at 11:35 PM, SoulWolf said: I definitely never did fit in with straight people... but at the same time, I also don't really feel like I can claim to be part of the LGBTQ+ community either. I feel basically "too weird" to fit in anywhere. ??? (I always joked that at high school I belonged to the "miscellaneous" group i.e. the group of people that were too weird to fit in with any of the other pre-established groups ) I actually "fit in" fine now, in terms of being able to establish friendship groups as an adult. But if the conversation topic ever goes to personal relationships (e.g. at work) I tend to stay quiet and not have much to contribute. Same as @Mark was saying further up, I'm often just stuck there thinking "That sounds like a traumatic experience. But I can't help much, since I'd never go there to start with." So yeah, in terms of life priorities and relationship goals, I basically still am "too weird to fit in anywhere" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DeltaAro Posted September 22, 2017 Share Posted September 22, 2017 22 hours ago, NullVector said: I guess I always thought of being in a romantic relationship as happening due to some very exceptional set of circumstances. Such as finding a person you have enough time and respect for to go through all the hassle and emotional trauma of getting into the romantic relationship in the first place Oh yes, I thought something similar: “Forming an enjoyable (nothing to say of stable and long-term) romantic relationship must be a major, difficult “life achievement”, like getting a PhD?!? Why is it so easy for everyone else?” Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NullVector Posted September 22, 2017 Share Posted September 22, 2017 14 minutes ago, DeltaV said: like getting a PhD?!? Hahaha, well since I've actually done this, it surely means that getting into a romantic relationship is comparatively more difficult than getting a PhD (not that I put anything like equivalent effort into attempting the former vs. the latter, of course ) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Apathetic Echidna Posted September 25, 2017 Share Posted September 25, 2017 @NullVector ooooh PhD. Do we get to call you Doctor NullVector now that we know this? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NullVector Posted September 25, 2017 Share Posted September 25, 2017 18 minutes ago, Apathetic Echidna said: Do we get to call you Doctor NullVector now that we know this? Hah, that kinda makes me sound like a comic book supervillain! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Holmbo Posted October 1, 2017 Share Posted October 1, 2017 I agree that labels can be a distraction sometimes. We see many discussion on this forum about trying to find the term that fits their exact preferences and feelings. That's good but sometimes I wonder if a part of it is the need to find approval; to show that it is real, it has a name. No one should have to give proof for their feelings or preferences. I find the label very useful most of the time. If the topic comes up in a text conversation I say that I'm aromantic and the other person then looks it up for themselves. I also think the label emphasizes that it's an orientation, not a choice. Since most people have an understanding of sexual orientation I extrapolate that and explain that the same thing exist for romantic feelings. But most of the people I've "come out" to is people who've asked me out. In general conversation I don't usually bring it up at all. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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