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What if i later fall for someone?


LICI
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Romance has always been shown as a part of our life, later to our realisation not everyone can fall in love. I having being questioning and thinking i am aromantic, confirm for like 95%. But still scared what if i label myself aromantic today but actually fall for someone tomorrow? And why am I feeling like this? Is this because I may not be aro or am I not able to accept my identity?

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4 hours ago, LICI said:

Romance has always been shown as a part of our life, later to our realisation not everyone can fall in love. I having being questioning and thinking i am aromantic, confirm for like 95%. But still scared what if i label myself aromantic today but actually fall for someone tomorrow? And why am I feeling like this? Is this because I may not be aro or am I not able to accept my identity?

It's okay to be uncertain. Sometimes gender, sexual, and romantic orientations change. Sometimes your experiences do change, and sometimes you find different labels to better describe your experiences. Being a person is all about change and fluidity. Don't be afraid to try out labels or identifiers out of fear that they could change- it's okay. 

Nobody will be able to "confirm" your identity for you. Only you can really know what you're experiencing and what it entails. But I suggest you give yourself some time to sit with how you're feeling. The label is meant to fit the person, not the other way around. And even then, it's not so cut and dry. We can't always fit neatly into little categories, and that's also okay. 

As for your last question- I think a majority of people in the queer community have experienced imposter syndrome when it comes to their labels. It's a given with being raised in a cisheteronormative, (and in our case amatonormative) society. I know I have

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I used to fear that too, when I was figuring out my identity. But then, a friend of mine told me that it doesn't really matter if my feelings change in the future. If aromantic is the label that feels right for me in the present, then I shouldn't be afraid to use it.

edit: oop I just saw aroace_uncle said what I wanted to say in a better and more detailed way. So, second that ☝?️

Edited by sol
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15 hours ago, LICI said:

what if i label myself aromantic today but actually fall for someone tomorrow?

then you fall for someone.

you work out what you want to do in that relationship, if you want to initiate something you talk it through with the person you have fell for. 

15 hours ago, LICI said:

Is this because I may not be aro or am I not able to accept my identity?

Wondering if you will fall in love some day in the future does not make you not aro. I wonder if I will be able to fly in the future and that did jack all, and all the thinking that I might do some exercise tomorrow has never shed a gram from me. So don't worry about that.

As for not accepting your identity, remember there is no prize for being the fastest to accept an identity. So there is still a bit of doubt in your mind that you may not be aromantic, you have to ask yourself what effect that doubt has and if you wish you didn't have that doubt, what you want to do to remove it. But for now, don't beat yourself up over not accepting an identity, there is no rush, take your time and read around, look at other peoples experiences and let things take their time.

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