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Everything posted by sol

  1. i'd love to see an aromantic character who is the "popular kid" at school. not the stereotypical asshole type, one who is kind and everyone likes. maybe like jackson marchetti from sex education, but aromantic? i think that would be fun. also, reading your responses, i think that maybe you would like Musa, an aroace character from the comic Buuza!! he's very sweet, confident and a good friend, he's trying his best. sadly, it's not directly stated in the story that he's aromantic, just in the characters' profiles. you can read it for free on Tapas or Webtoon if you'd like! :)
  2. i'm out to some of my friends. i'm not really the one to formally come out, i just bring it up sometimes if it makes sense in the conversation and i feel comfortable doing so. therefore, other than my friends, some acquaintances are aware too. my mom knows i'm not into romance and stuff, but she probably thinks i'm homo. regarding my dad, he asked me if i'm a lesbian when he saw i cut my hair short and i just told him i'm not, so yeah. also, i do use a bracelet with the aromantic flag a friend gave me, so... if people know, they know
  3. I don't think people at pride act like being queer is their whole personality, we're simply celebrating a part of ourselves that used to be and still is marginalized. I see every orientation as being a trait of someone's character. Just as yours and mine entire personality isn't based on being aro, the same goes for every LGBTQ+ person, but that doesn't mean it's not important to talk about. There are people out there who are struggling with amatonormativity and increasing the range of the term aromatic could help them in some way. I hope I managed to convey my perspective well!
  4. hello! I would like to join the discord server, but the link expired again. Could you please post another new one?
  5. yesterday i told my friend i'm aromantic. her reaction was: "isn't it because of some trauma? have you talked to your therapist about that?" thanks for doubting my existence, i guess
  6. I know some confirmed arospec characters from comics I like: There's Musa, from the comic BUUZA!!, who is an aroace and nonbinary poc: https://tapas.io/episode/1278135 Walker, the main character from the oneshot comic Wandering, is also aroace: https://tapas.io/episode/610674 Landon Addison, one of the main characters from This is Not Fiction, is demiromantic and pansexual: https://www.thisisnotfiction.com/comic/ch-01-sydney-morgan I think it's worth mentioning Landon is involved in some sort of romance with the main character (who is panromantic and demisexual), just in case you're romance repulsed and maybe don't want to read about that. (here's the synopsis and info about characters: https://www.thisisnotfiction.com/about)
  7. cw // internalized arophobia, internalized amatonormativity I've accepted the fact that I'm aromantic a long time ago, and most of the time I'm okay with it, even proud. But sometimes, when I'm watching a movie or reading a book, I see characters being deeply in love and the thought that "I may never experience something like that" crosses my mind. It's frustrating to catch myself having such thoughts when I should be comfortable with my aroness by now. Obviously, that has to do with the fact that the romanticization of romance was very strong in my education. (and of course, the lack of aro representation in media doesn't help) There are times I feel like the only way I can have a deep relationship is by having a romantic partner, because friendships are supposed to be more "casual", and my mind goes on a melancholic loop. I can't help but think that "is that how my entire life is going to be? Having casual friends to casually meet and have casual fun?", even though I'm usually comfortable being alone. So yeah... Amatonormativity sucks, what's new. (sorry for the rambling) Do you feel like that sometimes too? And if so, how do you deal with those intruding thoughts? Would love to read what you guys have to say!
  8. i actually had a similar experience a few years ago.. a really close friend of mine had romantic feelings for me and i thought i had too, but after a while i realized i saw them as a friend. i knew i also never had a crush on anyone before, so i did some reasearch and found out about aromanticism. a few weeks later, i told my friend that i was pretty sure i'm aromantic, explained what it was and they were very understanding! they told me about their feelings, i told them about my feelings and we decided to continue as friends. i was really scared of hurting them, but it turned out alright and we're still very close friends to this day i don't know how your friend is like, so i cannot guarantee how they will react, but if you want to tell them and feel comfortable doing so, then i think you should go for it! you can tell them about you romantic orientation, but you don't have to. you can just talk about your feelings and decide together what to do next! it's really what Skylord already said. hope it goes well!!
  9. this thread is so wholesome, i love it! I feel like I value my relationships more than my allo friends. They focus so much on their romantic relationships or on seeking for a romantic relationship, they seem to put their other relationships aside. During my self-discovery journey, I found out about so many new interesting terms and was able to reframe my idea of love. It made me think outside the box and reflect on what I truly want and what I don't. I think if I wasn't aromantic, I wouldn't try to understand my feelings in such depth. And I love understanding more about myself! (also I love the aromantic flag very much, green is my favorite color)
  10. maybe what you feel for him is sensual attraction?? Sensual Attraction - desire to have physical, non-sexual contact with someone (kissing, hugging, cuddling, etc) when you feel sensual attraction for someone, you call them a lush. so maybe he's a lush? (more info: https://lgbta.wikia.org/wiki/Sensual_Attraction)
  11. oi, eu também sou do Brasil!! se quiser conversar sobre arromanticidade com alguém que fala português, pode me chamar na mensagem privada qualquer hora!
  12. if you don't feel romantic attraction then you're certainly on the aro spectrum, even though you desire "romantic acts". there are some aromantic and aro-spec people who are/want to be in a romantic relationship, even without feeling romantic attraction. there are some subsets on the aromantic spectrum that may be suitable for you, such as cupioromantic or bellusromantic. there are also other types of attraction and relationships besides romantic. if you're interessed in researching in depth, here you can find some terms that could be useful for you
  13. yes, i meant 'practical' as less stressful for me, since i wouldn't like to explain what aegoromantic means everytime someone asks my orientation, i'm not so patient but of course, that's just my way. each person do what they feel more comfortable doing
  14. yeah, i feel the same! i want to look for more about it so i can understand my feelings better, but if someone asked me my orientation i would just call myself aroace, it's more practical
  15. i see... thank you for clarifying! i think it describes me pretty well, i'll research more about it
  16. that's interesting, i didn't know about this term! i'm still kinda confused though, please correct me if i'm wrong, but instead of 'aegoromantic', couldn't it be used 'romance-positive aromantic'?
  17. sol

    Aro POCs

    yayy latine gang!!! that's so cool!!
  18. there's Yuu Asuka from Hoshiai no Sora (Stars Align)! they had two little scenes where they talk about their feelings regarding gender with the main character. it was a really small subplot, but it was treated in a very respectful way and took me by surprise. the anime itself has many many flaws, but i'm glad at least these scenes were done nicely. since most non-binary characters i've seen before are some kind of weird entity or not human (justifying their gender non-conformity), it's kinda refreshing seeing an actual normal person being enby. yuu is just a soft tennis club manager who is questioning their gender. https://i.redd.it/sap3nqausp241.png (i'm not able to add images for some reason, so i put the image link)
  19. sol

    Aro POCs

    hello! i'm brown and brazilian. that's pretty much what i wanted to say, just to make an addition to the thread idk good to see more poc in here!
  20. when i was nine, i had a diary that had little questions to answer about yourself, like "what's your favorite food?" and stuff like that. a few months ago, i found it while organizing my shelf, so i started reading it and there was a question that said "what is your crush's name and why do you like them?". i chose a random classmate's name and to explain why i liked him i literally wrote "because when someone asks me who I like I have to have an answer" THIS IS EXACTLY WHAT I WROTE WORD BY WORD KJKFDHFKL reading that sentence now knowing i'm aro was the funniest shit ever, but it's also kinda sad that i was already affected by amatonormativity at the age of nine when i was thirteen, my mom asked me if i liked boys or girls, all i said was "i don't know, i don't really care about that" imagine my mom's concerned face when i was fourteen, some of my friends and classmates started shipping me with my best friend. my friends asked me several times if i liked him and i would always be like "i don't know??? how do you know if you like someone??" and they would explain to me how it feels to have a crush and i would be like #?$@error 404%#* (turns out he didn't like me neither so it was fine, the shipping didn't change anything (also shipping your classmates is so weird why do people do that))
  21. hey! i recently finished reading Loveless by Alice Oseman and really really loved it! it's a YA novel that focuses on Georgia, a 18 y.o. girl that just started university and is trying to figure out her sexuality and stuff, to then realize she is aromantic asexual. it's basically an aroace coming out story, following Georgia's journey on self discovery, from hearing the terms aromantic and asexual for the first time to coming to therms with it personally. i always loved Alice Oseman's books and almost freaked out when she announced her new book was going to focus on a aroace character!!! i loved it so much and could relate to so many aspects of it, specially the she deals with amatonormativity, romance and friendship. there are also other aromantic and asexual side characters as well, and one of them is non-binary, which is greatttt i'm obsessed with this book, honestly slkjdk i totally recommend reading it
  22. i can really relate to almost everything you said lskdlsfj fanfics and fictional characters are awesome. ideally, having a partner seems cool, but real life is disappointing honestly.. not all aromantics are romance repulsed, it's okay to be aro and still enjoy romance!
  23. i'm Babo, my pronouns are they/them, i love webcomics and frogs, and i should be doing my homework but here i am! i started to identify myself as aromantic asexual in 2017, but recently i started liking this girl and now i'm really confused about my romantic orientation. i'm not sure if what i feel for her is romantic attraction. i have strong feelings for her, but i don't really want to do anything about it nor want her to like me back, so if i do like her romantically i think i might be greyromantic lithromantic. but she might be a squish,,, i've never had one before so i literally can't tell them apart so yeah.. i don't know any aro irl, so i joined here hoping to read other aros' experiences and stuff, so i can learn and maybe understand my feelings better!! (english isn't my first language so please don't be mean if i made some mistakes)
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