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Pride, Annoyance and FWB (a rant)


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I've known I'm aromantic for a while, a few years now. I realized that romantic relationships stress me out and I get avoidance and anxiety in droves. So no problem, I'm aro. Cool. But like. I want FWBs. More than one. And a Highlight on the FRIENDS part there. I have one at the moment, who is the worst about communication or meeting up, so whatever its all good. 

But lately I've been slipping back into realizing that everyone I try to flirt with our start trying to build the kind of friendship I need to be a fwb with someone, stops talking to me for some reason. They get bored I guess, or don't like that I actually try to get to know them. 

I was trying to vent to a friend this morning and she was liek "Well you're aro" even when I said multiple times I'm talking about making friends first. And she just kept pushing the "WELL YOU'RE ARO" as a reason people who I want to just build friendships with stop talking to me. Like no. I'm not even trying to flirt yet. I'm not even thinking about that yet. I'm just trying to have conversation. 

I'm in a horrible mood now and I am actually somewhat tempted to go home and work at the house for the rest of the day. I don't think I need anything that is directly in the office. So Idk. 

Basically I'm just a frustrated Aro who wants to start building fwb relationships and having 0 prospects for that. 

 

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1 hour ago, reinyday91 said:

I was trying to vent to a friend this morning and she was liek "Well you're aro" even when I said multiple times I'm talking about making friends first. And she just kept pushing the "WELL YOU'RE ARO" as a reason people who I want to just build friendships with stop talking to me. Like no. I'm not even trying to flirt yet. I'm not even thinking about that yet. I'm just trying to have conversation. 

so according to your friend aro people can't get to know others anymore or start friendships, that's certainly the first time i've seen that take. i guess we can't truly comprehend the art of asking someone what's their favorite color ?‍♀️

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That's... weird. I don't even get what she meant by that. Does she thinks aro can't make friends? But she is your friend. Does she also thinks you can't have a sexual relationship? You are aro not asexual. Or maybe she thinks aro can't be upset or sad when we people walk away? She needs to educate herself then.

I would also be upset if I were you.

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20 hours ago, ilse said:

so according to your friend aro people can't get to know others anymore or start friendships, that's certainly the first time i've seen that take. i guess we can't truly comprehend the art of asking someone what's their favorite color ?‍♀️

RIGHT. Ok. So She and I had been talking about finding people to flirt with and I think that she was just stuck on that. Like no. I don't flirt with people right away. Geez. 

19 hours ago, nonmerci said:

That's... weird. I don't even get what she meant by that. Does she thinks aro can't make friends? But she is your friend. Does she also thinks you can't have a sexual relationship? You are aro not asexual. Or maybe she thinks aro can't be upset or sad when we people walk away? She needs to educate herself then.

I would also be upset if I were you.

Yeah! I'm good today but like. It was so annoying and frustrating. 

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