Help please

[ItsComplicated]

Hi! My name is Josie and I’m ace but I’m starting to think that I may also be aro! I’ve never been in a relationship before but I’ve never really wanted to be in one either. I’ve had ‘crushes’ in the past but they never felt real or genuine and I think that all those times I was just aesthetically attracted to them. It’s hard for me to explain how I feel especially since I don’t know what I’m feeling. So I think I might be aro but I don’t know how to determine that. If you need any more info just let me know!
 

Anyone want to help a girl out I appreciate it!

Edited October 29, 2020 by ItsComplicated

[Alaska Native Manitou]

I can't tell what you actually want help with.

[aro-fae]

Welcome to the forum. There are some pinned threads in the subforum "Aromantic" that discuss common aro experiences, if you need help figuring out whether you're aro or not. It's not something anyone can really "assign" you, it's something you have to choose to identify with for yourself, because the identity and community feel useful in your understanding of yourself and how you relate to the world. Hope that helps! 

[ItsComplicated]

I’m just a little unsure about where I put myself on the spectrum

[Rolo]

If you want help figuring that out you're going to have to give us more information.

[aro-fae]

Here's a post about quoiromanticism, here's something about demiromanticism, and here's something about grayromanticism. That's all I can really do without any info. Feel free to read through things! And don't feel obligated to share all of your experiences, just know that the less information an outsider has, the less helpful that we can be

[ItsComplicated]

@aro-fae I’m not sure what info you would like I’ve never been on a forum like this before so idrk what else to add. 

[CharCharChar]

You could describe the feelings you had that you think might be romantic. 
You could describe what about the person you felt attracted to, or what you think triggered the attraction, or what you wanted to do with the person. 
You could describe how often or in what circumstance you think you are feeling romantic attraction.
You could describe the kind of relationship you want (or don't want). 

Some words to consider if you're having trouble describing the feeling:
glowing, safe, electric, warm, happy, calm, cuddly, desperate, longing, giddy, excited, curious, anxious, tense, loose, self-conscious, pulled-in, alive, awake, confident, whole

(it's still going to be you who picks the label that makes sense to you)

Edited October 29, 2020 by CharCharChar

[ItsComplicated]

@CharCharChar thank you. So I tend to trick my brain into thinking I like someone but it’s usually just me liking their vibe. This most recently happened with a close friend of mine who is like family and I understand that now what happened was I thought I liked them romantically but then I took some time for myself and realized that’s not at all how I feel. I’ve never felt romantically attracted to anyone before and I also genuinely feel safer when I’m with myself! Thank you this really helps and I think ace and aro fit me like a cheap friendship necklace from Claire’s!??