New and unsure with all the terminology ??‍♀️

[Platonic Greyscale]

Where to start....

I've rewritten this 3 times now. Maybe the place to start is to tell you all a few bullet points about me and you help "define" me.

- I do tend to be in long term relationships.

- I can go for very long periods of time without wanting to be sexually active with my partner.

- Romance and other intimate details make me very uncomfortable. Like I really hate things like candle lit dinners or eye gazing and esp valentines day lol

- I like both genders based on them as a person. Not looks money etc.

- I have found myself wanting to cuddle, kiss, and be with my friends that are close to me. Which really has only been twice. Most of my friendships are distant (emotionally).

- It's really difficult for me to be open with people, to form real meaningful relationships (friendships or romantic) and when friendships become close and meaningful I tend to want them to be more. ( like more than friends, but not exactly "lovers" maybe still with some sexual moments and I find myself obsessing when they have something that feels more important that me or something that discloses me) 

Edited August 23, 2020 by Platonic Greyscale

[Platonic Greyscale]

Like can someone Q&A me lol

[emmafriendly]

 

4 hours ago, Platonic Greyscale said:

I can go for very long periods of time without wanting to be sexually active with my partner.

This sounds like grayasexual to me.

4 hours ago, Platonic Greyscale said:

I have found myself wanting to cuddle, kiss, and be with my friends that are close to me.

4 hours ago, Platonic Greyscale said:

when friendships become close and meaningful I tend to want them to be more. ( like more than friends, but not exactly "lovers" maybe still with some sexual moments

These quotes both make me think you may have an inclination towards queerplatonic relationships, which is a term used pretty widely by aromantic spectrum people. If this seems to describe the "long term relationships" you find yourself in, or the ones you desire to have, then it's possible you're aromantic.

I don't think it's either/or though. Maybe you do have romantic attraction, but also find yourself wanting something like a queerplatonic relationship. 

4 hours ago, Platonic Greyscale said:

Romance and other intimate details make me very uncomfortable

This doesn't automatically make you aromantic, but it could be an indicator. Romance-repulsed aros are not terribly uncommon.

-

This is pretty surface level and shallow obviously, only knowing what you said in your post it's not like I can say for sure what you identify as, but from what you said this is just what it appears to be to me. Of course, the ONLY PERSON who can say what you identify as is YOU. Do whatever the hell you want and don't let anyone define yourself for you.

Best of luck!! We're always here for you if you have questions.

[Platonic Greyscale]

I was actually reading more on being in a Queerplatonic relationship and thought this sounds like something I relate to. I hadn't heard the term before. 

[roboticanary]

As said before, only you can define you. QPR seems to be a good idea though based on what you are talking about and I am glad you are looking at it.

 

Anyways, welcome aboard

[Platonic Greyscale]

16 hours ago, roboticanary said:

As said before, only you can define you. QPR seems to be a good idea though based on what you are talking about and I am glad you are looking at it.

 

Anyways, welcome aboard

I suppose I meant "define me" more in a curious way. Like taking those ridiculous quizzes that tell you what kind of ice cream flavor you would be based on the following questions lol. 

I'm pretty secure with myself and know I don't actually need a word or others beliefs to justify anything. Hopefully everyone knows this as well. You are who you are and that's a beautiful thing! ?