omitef Posted May 12, 2016 Posted May 12, 2016 So I have a squish on this girl who recently moved in next door to me, and I just discovered she is extremely allo. She has this crush on a guy (who doesn't even like her and is kind of toying with her feelings), and she won't stop talking about him. I feel bad that I can't relate to her, and that every time she starts talking, I don't know what to say back--or worse, I want to call her out on how ridiculous her feelings are. When she talks about romance, she sounds like a character from a shipping fanfic written by a twelve-year-old, she sounds like Taylor Swift, she sounds like every cliche ever written about romance--everything is so over-the-top and I just want her to shut up whenever she starts going off about it. I don't want to stop being friends with her, but I'm afraid she'll think I'm rude or dismissive, because I don't like talking about romance with her. What can I do to make conversations about romance more bearable, in a way that won't hurt either of us?
Cassiopeia Posted May 12, 2016 Posted May 12, 2016 Did you tell her about the arospec stuff? If the topic makes you repulsed, then I guess it would make sense to tell her, because right now she does not even know she makes you uncomfortable.
Blue Phoenix Ace Posted May 12, 2016 Posted May 12, 2016 I think good friends should be able to set boundaries with each other, and to be honest. If she understands your point of view, and what Lithromanticism means, then she will back off if she is a good friend. She might actually seek out your unique perspective about her romantic endeavors. Good luck!
omitef Posted May 13, 2016 Author Posted May 13, 2016 Thanks, @Cassiopeia and @Blue Phoenix Ace. I will try coming out as arospec, although, seeing how allo she is, I strongly suspect that she won't get it. I hope she won't hate me or try to invalidate me. If she does then I'm afraid we won't be able to be friends.
Louis On Air Posted May 14, 2016 Posted May 14, 2016 Well this may be quite an absolute way to say this but: a friend who your uncomfortable around is not a great friend and a friend who you can't be comfortable around is not a friend at all. So I would recommend coming clear to her about being 'Lith AF' and who knows, this could be the start of something great!
omitef Posted May 20, 2016 Author Posted May 20, 2016 I ended up coming out though and she was actually 100% fine with it LOL
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