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Spud
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So I guess I might as well post my own welcome post thingy, even though I've already made a few posts.

 

So I'm 14 and questioning if I'm aromantic or gray-aromantic or whatever. I've been on AVEN for a little over a month, and I saw that this existed and was really excited about it. 

 

I always just assumed I was straight, but it felt really wrong saying stuff like "I'm straight" or even "I'm not gay," because, in all honesty, I had no idea. And I still don't. So that's why I decided to make an account. Yay!

 

Two questions for everyone: 

1) Is there a way so that I don't get an email for every notification I get on here? I can't figure it out!

2) What do you think of using ice cream as a greeting on welcome posts as a counterpart to AVEN's cake?

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Oh I figured out how to fix it!

 

Anyway, it feels weird to be using this forum since it's very similar to AVEN, yet some functions are different! I can't wrap my mind around how to use it correctly yet!

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Hello Spud! 

 

I know that in my case, it took a bit of contemplation and even trying on labels to see if they contextualized my experiences in a way that made sense. Aromanticism clicked pretty quickly through that method. Admittedly, I was in college when I did that and I mostly looked back on my middle/high school dating experiences to contextualize it, so I have no clue how much that would help you. For anyone of any age, the best thing I could say would be to be patient. Having an identity click in a lightbulb moment is rare and to have multiple identities click like that is even rarer. Sometimes, you just need a slow realization to figure things out :)

 

Also, I unclicked the email notification option when I signed up for the site, so I'm sure there's something in the preferences to shut them off!

 

Oh, and ice cream kinda makes me laugh as a cake alternative because ice cream is that stereotypical food item that women eat while crying over a breakup in a lot of media :P

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1 minute ago, Mezzo Forte said:

Oh, and ice cream kinda makes me laugh as a cake alternative because ice cream is that stereotypical food item that women eat while crying over a breakup in a lot of media :P

Haha, I just realized that. It makes me laugh a little now. Reclaim the ice cream, everyone!

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Hi Spud!!

 

It took me a long time to figure out my romantic orientation, so you aren't alone in being confused.  For me asexuality clicked almost immediately after hearing the term, but aromanticism took a lot more thought.  When I first joined AVEN I even contemplated joing with gray-ro on my profile because I still wasn't sure.  You're figuring this out much faster than I did though, I didn't identify as aro until I was nearly 20.

 

As for your questions, I used my junk email to sign up here, so if I'm been getting email notifications I haven't even noticed!  I should probably also find a way to stop it though.  And I will never say no to a question that involves ice cream! :)

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I've been in the awkward questioning place too! It was weird because I didn't feel any different after deciding that aromanticity felt like my own experience, even after reading countless stories and personal experiences from people who'd come to identify as aro. Eventually I decided I would identify as aro until something came up to change my mind. It's been over six months and I'm getting more and more comfortable calling myself aro and ace. Not sure if this helps, but generally the advice to questioning people is identify however makes you feel comfortable, and don't be afraid to try on identities to see if they fit. Good luck figuring yourself out! And no rush! :) :icecream:

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2 hours ago, Mezzo Forte said:

 

Oh, and ice cream kinda makes me laugh as a cake alternative because ice cream is that stereotypical food item that women eat while crying over a breakup in a lot of media :P

 

I guess that whats they eat with their aro friends.

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Hi, Spud! I totally know how you feel (at 14, I assumed I had to be straight by default because I didn't feel anything towards a specific gender). I'm a 20 year old college student majoring in Biology, and I hope to work with animals (or even plants) for a career.

 

As for your questions:

 

1) Is there a way so that I don't get an email for every notification I get on here? I can't figure it out!

 

To turn off your notifications, click on your username in the top right corner. Under "settings", go to Account Settings. From there, click on "notification settings" under "other settings." The option to opt out of emails is at the top of the list of stuff to opt in/out of. 

 

2) What do you think of using ice cream as a greeting on welcome posts as a counterpart to AVEN's cake?

 

Sure, why not? I'm down for ice cream.

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Welcome!

I also thought I was default straight until I found out about asexuality (and then aromantic) at 16... Good luck figuring it out!

 

 

And ice cream sounds like a great idea.

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