DreamSeeker

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Hi again. I haven’t posted in awhile but I have something I want to say. Just like today I made this song about how before I figured out I was aro I wanted to fall in love and was like romance-obsessed, in theory anyway, but then how now I am kinda accepting that I’m aro (I didn’t explicitly say I was aro in the song though) and probably wont ever fall in love, but that that’s ok because I’m happy and realize that it’s not my thing. Anyway that’s beside my point, I just tried to summarize it up as good as possible. So what people were responding to that, well they kept saying stuff like “That song is so sad. You know though you still have a lot of time to find someone; you’re young. And they were like most people your age haven’t fallen in love yet… even my mom who I told I was aromantic to- This is our conversation (as close as possible anyway): My mom: that was so sad. I don’t get you, though. Lots of people your age haven’t fallen in love yet, and you still have plenty of time to find someone, so don’t worry “ me: But it’s not that easy for me my mom: why not? me: … because I’m aro my mom: Well yeah , but you can still love people. (This is when I started to question if she actually even knew what aromantic meant.? Like the song was specifically referring to falling in love not love in general, so pretty sure she just told me I could fall in love, which no I can’t…) me: But it’s different (gets weird look in return) All of this just made me feel like no one understood. And then the “don’t worry you’re such an awesome girl, you’ll find someone sometime and when you do it will be amazing” comments made it worse. Right when I finally accepted being aromantic, right when I finally was starting to accept myself, they started saying I’ll find someone. I’m probably overreacting and making this much more of a big deal than it has to be, but in my head I was quite literally dying because like no one gets it. If anyone has anything to say, I would really appreciate a response or if you relate at all, that would also be helpful!

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Me describing to my friend the other day why I first thought I was in love with my now ex-boyfriend : Me: Hes easy to talk to, we laugh a lot when we are together, and we both like drinking milk so we are definitely meant to be together. My friend: 🤦‍♀️that’s literally just friendship

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That helped so much. Thank you!

I realized I was aromantic a few months ago in like July, but since then several doubts have kept coming up- not that I’m too young to know or something- but I just want to know how other people have handled it. I’ve dated before, but we never actually touched… like literally nothing more than a high five in the 8 months we dated. And the idea of kissing repulses me, not sure why. I thought it was because I was aro, but then I keep questioning myself if maybe I’m not aro and then I’m just repulsed by kissing? But then at the same time I’ve never like been “ooo I want to marry you” or like “I can’t take my eyes off of you” or like “I just want to cuddle you”. Sorry if that was phrased weirdly lol. But then I keep wondering if maybe I really am just repulsed by kissing, and I’ll meet someone I love romantically later. I keep convincing myself I’m aro but then the same thoughts keep coming back over and over. What do you think I should do? How any of you been in similar situations to this?