Blue Phoenix Ace

Yeah "commonly reported symptoms".

If you look for "romantic attraction" on this page, I think it sums it up quite well:

https://thethinkingasexual.wordpress.com/identity-attraction-relationship-terms/

Quote

romantic attraction – Romantic attraction is a subjective feeling that has no universally applicable definition. It is can only be known and recognized through first hand experience. Romantic attraction is traditionally thought of as the motivation to pair-bond with someone in the context of a romantic relationship, but pair-bonding can also take place between two people who love each other nonromantically. (And for polyamorous individuals, romantic attraction isn’t restricted to a single relationship at a time.) Romantic attraction may create the desire to “date” or to marry, to be in an emotionally intimate relationship that is either closed or highly exclusive, to demonstrate one’s feelings using stereotypically romantic gestures, to engage in frequent physical or verbal affection, etc. Romantic attraction is often characterized as producing feelings of excitement, wonder, intense interest or fascination, jealousy or possessiveness, intense happiness (euphoria) for no reason or simply at the thought or sight of the other person, etc. Other commonly reported symptoms include persistent and intrusive thoughts about the romantic interest, which can reach a point of obsessive thinking, and grandiose fantasies involving the expression of one’s romantic interest/love to the other person. It is important to acknowledge, however, that sometimes features of “romantic” attraction/love can also happen in a platonic relationship or characterize platonic feelings/love.

James Park, an existential philosopher and author, attempted to define romantic attraction/love in a small book breaking it down into 26 points. The online version may be found here.

It is worth noting that even within romantic-sexual relationships, romantic attraction can be temporary even while love survives it. In long-term romantic-sexual or romantic-nonsexual partnerships, romantic attraction usually changes or branches off into emotional attraction

Nope sorry, I didn't see any ice cream or I would have used that one.  

Level Up!!! I dunno, it looks too small or something.

Yeah it is the Rebel Alliance thing. Hence me saying "mmm hmmm".

Here's what we have to pick from. The thumbs up is there but it seems a bit overdone don't you think?

https://fortawesome.github.io/Font-Awesome/icons/

Mmm hmmm. I have to pick from a particular font. There are a few arrows but they don't really look great.

Jealousy and/or exclusivity (perhaps)?

Someone pointed out a few weeks ago that it was ironic that a site for aromantics would use the heart symbol for "Like This". Since the heart is so often associated with romance, I tend to agree with that.

So, I'm trying out a different symbol. I think it looks pretty cool, but apparently AdBlock might make it not show up. Let me know if you're having any trouble seeing it, or if you think it looks silly. Enjoy!

I'm curious about this too. I would imagine this would be fairly rare. Maybe it could be brought on by a very abusive relationship and breakup?

4 hours ago, Spud said:

YMBAI you don't understand the concept of online dating or are confused by the fact that people deliberately try to find a partner (and go on dates before they even know them).

LOL, I thought that the interest in dating would come after I tried it a few (actually many) times. Didn't happen...

Hmm, I am definitely seeing exclusivity is a good keyword to distinguish crush from squish, and romantic attraction from platonic attraction. I can agree with @omitef that with polyamory, you could be exclusive with three or more people, instead of the traditional two. Exclusivity sounds better than jealousy too. The jealousy springs from a desire to be the "one and only" with a person. Seeing or imagining them with someone else filling that role can cause jealousy (among other bad feelings).

Not sure about that one just yet. It's one of the least used forums on AVEN.

26 minutes ago, Simowl said:

Is there any way to view the stats on members? It had it on the front page (amount of members/latest member joined/most active at one point) but it's gone now - I think due to the poll? Maybe an option to toggle it or just a separate page or something? (I really like seeing how many members this place has got)

That was taking up a lot of screen real estate for very little gain. If you want to know the number of members, go to the search screen and look for members. Then leave all the fields blank. That'll show you everybody (153 right now).

18 minutes ago, Tal Shi'ar said:

Maybe have an Arcade section like AVEN so that people can still have spammy post threads without affecting post count or filling up other sections in OT

Sure, why not?  

My parents took it really well. They believed me since I'm in my upper 30's and don't seem to work too hard at the dating game. Luckily my sister has a son, so they can't put the guilt trip of never giving them grandchildren on me.

On 4/12/2016 at 10:43 PM, Avian said:

The other person would invariably start flooding me with expectations - upset that I didn't want to spend more time with them, upset that I didn't reciprocate their romantic gestures, upset that I didn't prioritize them above my other friends. I assume "romantic attraction" is what drives people to want and enjoy doing those things, but to me it only ever seemed like chores that the other person had no right to demand of me. I felt trapped and repulsed. I was always the one to end it. This was all before I started reading into aromanticism, and the relationship attempts lasted anywhere from 3 days ~ 6 months (depending on how clingy/needy the other person was.)

That was a perfect way to explain how stifling it felt to be in a relationship. I would give you a star if I could, but I don't even have that power.

YMBAI you think they ruined the second season of Daredevil with romance. (I don't think I can even finish it, it's a huge letdown from season 1)

I set the like limit to unlimited. So, I guess that's as high as you're allowed to go.

I figured it out, for some reason I didn't see the icon when you mentioned it earlier. The defaults were set that way, so I changed the shortcut for the raised eyebrow to "eyebrow" inside of colons 

YMBAI you find silly reasons not to date someone that wouldn't be important in a long term relationship. Things like "her hair is too long" or "he doesn't watch the Walking Dead".

5 hours ago, RedNeko said:

When you use emoticons, o. O and O. o both come up with but one of them is meant to be the emoticon with the raised eyebrow.

Sure, find me a good royalty-free emoticon and I will add it to the list.

Source code button

On 4/6/2016 at 9:41 PM, Rising Sun said:

Where are advanced formatting options ? If you directly type HTML or BBCode, does the software automatically convert it ? I can't even find a way to "un-format" text or directly edit code 

OK, I added a source edit button. It uses HTML tags. I tried some options with BBCode but it caused some other weird issues.

Me on Facebook: I'm doing a "research paper" (but really just more curious than anything). In your mind, what are some of the differences between a romantic relationship and a close friendship?

Jeff: Sex

Me replied: What about friends with benefits?

Leah: I think the feeling of attachment, adoration, and sometimes possession distinguishes romantic involvement from close friendship. And usually sex. You *can* have a celibate romantic relationship, but it's rare in practice -- if the act isn't there, the desire probably is. On the other hand, you can have a sexual relationship without romance, but that tends to unravel, either turning into romance or actual enmity.

Kitsy: My thoughts on a "Close friendship" ...........We have a history..shared life events..love being together, not jealous when not together, would sacrifice for each other, a confidant, accept their/my idiosyncracies....have fun together...no sexual interest in the friend whether male or female......as in I could sleep in a bed with them and the interaction would be the same as if I were with a sister/brother. Thoughts on a "Romantic relationship"....... .We have a history together or are developing one....love being together, not jealous when not together would sacrifice for each other, a confidant, accept their/my idiosyncracies....... heart flutters or there are some psycho-sexual feelings when they are around.....want to be in physical contact a lot as in you can hardly stand it when you aren't touching.......this tends to wane when you've been together a million years but physicalness should always be part of a romantic relationship, even if it is only hugging, snuggling or holding hands. That's all I've got.

I highlighted the interesting stuff in bold (obviously). I'm not sure it's very clear though.

YMBAI when asked what you want out of a romantic relationship the best thing you can come up with is "cook for her and share a meal together".

9 hours ago, Zemaddog said:

I'm 18. And glad that i finished school last year cause i never want to have to deal with that again.

High school pretty much sucks. College is totally different, so much better.

3 hours ago, Cassiopeia said:

But absurdly, I felt guilty that I did not feel possessive or territorial at all. I mean according to my allo friend, I was supposed to hate him or something to prove that I loved my girlfriend. Wut?

When I broke up with my girlfriend she immediately got in a rebound relationship with her ex that she dated before me. I think she was trying to make me feel jealous or something. I didn't feel anything but relief that she wasn't my responsibility anymore.

37

Will be pushing 40 here in a couple of months.