A long story rant thing… (just so you’re aware)

[DreamSeeker]

Hi again. I haven’t posted in awhile but I have something I want to say.

Just like today I made this song about how before I figured out I was aro I wanted to fall in love and was like romance-obsessed, in theory anyway, but then how now I am kinda accepting that I’m aro (I didn’t explicitly say I was aro in the song though) and probably wont ever fall in love, but that that’s ok because I’m happy and realize that it’s not my thing. 
Anyway that’s beside my point, I just tried to summarize it up as good as possible.

So what people were responding to that, well they kept saying stuff like “That song is so sad. You know though you still have a lot of time to find someone; you’re young. And they were like most people your age haven’t fallen in love yet… even my mom who I told I was aromantic to-

This is our conversation (as close as possible anyway): 

My mom: that was so sad. I don’t get you, though. Lots of people your age haven’t fallen in love yet, and you still have plenty of time to find someone, so don’t worry “ 

me: But it’s not that easy for me 

my mom: why not?

me: … because I’m aro

my mom: Well yeah , but you can still love people. (This is when I started to question if she actually even knew what aromantic meant.? Like the song was specifically referring to falling in love not love in general, so pretty sure she just told me I could fall in love, which no I can’t…)

me: But it’s different (gets weird look in return) 

All of this just made me feel like no one understood. And then the “don’t worry you’re such an awesome girl, you’ll find someone sometime and when you do it will be amazing” comments made it worse. Right when I finally accepted being aromantic, right when I finally was starting to accept myself, they started saying I’ll find someone. I’m probably overreacting and making this much more of a big deal than it has to be, but in my head I was quite literally dying because like no one gets it.

If anyone has anything to say, I would really appreciate a response or if you relate at all, that would also be helpful! 

[MondoBilby]

Sorry that happened to you, man. It sucks when people completely misinterprit what you're trying to say. I'm sure they weren't trying to be rude at all, but it still stings and your feelings are 100% real and okay.

[Ekaterina]

Have you tried explaining them what being aromantic means? If yes and they still were doing that, it just looks like they don't want to understand someone can want different things in life and have a different idea of happiness, which is an issue with them, not with you. Sorry you have to deal with this treatment, sending virtual hugs to you if you are okay with them: 🫂

Don't let it get in your head, people who think they know better what everyone needs or wants while they are just projecting and unwilling to listen are a pain, whether to aros, to people with unpopular interests, to everyone who isn't a copy of themselves in general. It isn't an issue with you.