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If someone could relate, that'd be great thanks


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Me: Am I pan because maybe I don't care about gender, or maybe I do, so maybe omniromantic, or maybe biromantic, or polyromantic. Wtf am I? I give up, labels aren't anything important anyway.

Also me: Gotta find a label- *Intense searching of the internet*

*Goofy ass Krusty the clown laughter* 

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Yes, I can relate to this!  I identified as panromantic for years before I considered the label aromantic, and I also resonate very strongly with the label WTFromantic (also known as quoiromantic).  Attraction is confusing, and I've long been torn between thinking that I experience either all of it or none of it. 

Right now, I think that I experience no romantic attraction at all, but I would still be happy to be in a non-romantic committed partnership with someone, regardless of their gender.   I still feel a bit torn between the labels "pan" and "aro," to be honest.  It might be accurate to say that I'm aromantic but pan-oriented?  Or maybe I'm just not oriented at all, because the "direction," so to speak, of my attraction doesn't matter much to me. 

I don't even know what kind of attraction I'm experiencing in the first place, and what if it's not attraction at all, but a desire for a certain outcome (being in a committed partnership)?  I'm not even sure what being attracted to someone feels like; I just meet people and grow close to them because of proximity, natural affinity, and efforts to maintain and cultivate the relationship.

So, yes: I am also distraught by romantic labels but ultimately considering not using them at all.  For now, "aroace" may be enough to satisfy me.  What is romantic attraction?  I have no idea!  But aromanticism is what resonates with me right now, so aromanticism it shall be!

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  • 2 weeks later...

This is so me. I've considered being mspec for such a long time before the possibility of me being aro has crossed my mind. I mean I still sometimes find myself questioning being both aroace AND mspec, but hey, at least now I'm aware of the lack of my attraction!

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