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No certainties, yet... I feel like something's starting to make sense.


BlueCandle
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Hi :)
I'm so, so very new at this. 
And I'm still definitely unsure about many things, but I feel that something, somehow, is starting to make sense. I had and still have so many doubts. I love dearly my few and trusted friends, my family, and sometimes I feel like I want to connect, getting to know someone that for some reason catches my        attention and my eye; sometimes wondering about how would it be to be in a relationship.... but not really thinking about it. Maybe realizing the possibility that "being with someone"  is not a need YOU really feel the need of having. Maybe you're perfectly happy with your friends' deep bonds, maybe what you might have perceived it's just the internalized norm, forcefed everywhere to everybody , the very one you absentmindedly followed until now, the default setting. I don't know. I'm not sure about anything, but reading so many things, so many stories different yet similar to mine, being able to relate to so many of them... I felt trapped, no clue what to do and the certainty that something was and felt really wrong with me. Then, finding this place has started giving me clarity, almost a hope to belong. And although I'm still unsure and confused about many things, I'm feeling so much better already, and I'm so, so grateful. 
Ps. My english sucks, so, sorry guys, forgive this demented girl and  her rambling about. 
   
                              
 

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Welcome. I'm glad you were able to find help from reading about our experiences. I can definitely relate to that moment of realizing "being with someone" wasn't something I truly wanted, and I remember having that experience through a close friendship. I hope you'll be able to explore your identity more, and make some friends while you're here!

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