Arden Posted December 22, 2022 Share Posted December 22, 2022 Due to immense grappling social anxiety I really don't usually do forums but I recently discovered I'm aromantic and asexual (aroace), and tbh I'm just chilling with that revelation. Basically, how it came is that I really really like someone, but it's not your traditional 'oh i want to shag her' nor your 'i want to date her' kind of situation, but I really am just fond of her. I've always found dates to be extremely exhaustive, like why should I have to consider every type of meeting with someone I like romantic? I'm also asexual, that was the first thing I discovered, and if you asked me a couple years ago if I was aromantic I would've cackled in your face but turns out, you don't need to be a heartless bastard to be aromantic. Yippee for me ig. Yeah, stereotypes of aromantic people is also what I'm keenly looking to overcome. The idea that you 'need to be innocent and sweet' or 'heartless and psychopathic'. And the idea you can't get into a relationship 'cough cough queer platonic relationship cough cough'. I've always had an issue because I consider myself moderately outgoing, but turns out I must be this meek and modest person to be aromantic and asexual. Well boohoo, I still dress like a total slut. I'm sort of looking to also find out about people who have been aromantic for ages, like older people. How does it integrate in society? How does it get when you're older? Like old old age? What to look out for etc. I could really do with that advice. So yeah, that's basically it. That's moi :))) 6 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
flowingleaves Posted December 22, 2022 Share Posted December 22, 2022 hi, nice to have you here! <2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
roboticanary Posted December 22, 2022 Share Posted December 22, 2022 Hi! just chillin is a good reaction to be honest, love it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Storm_leopardcat Posted December 23, 2022 Share Posted December 23, 2022 Hello, and welome to the Arocalypse! For those feelings/attraction you are describing, try checking out alterous attraction! Is it a physcial attraction, or more of an emotional one? Check this post out: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Arden Posted December 23, 2022 Author Share Posted December 23, 2022 If I'm being honest, I'm aware of the fact that it's gonna be hard to explain the attraction I have towards my friend (since it's neither romantic, platonic or sexual), and I do love her a lot and we've been talking about getting into a queer platonic relationship for a while now but the alterous attraction is the most accurate description to what I feel. It's emotional, since I couldn't care less what she looked like, and it's just I love her more than platonic and more deeply than platonic but not in the romantic sense. The romantic feelings never made sense to me. Thank u sm for that, again, I'm not actively trying to label my feelings for anyone since I reached a point about 2 months ago when I was like 'ya know what, it's my business what I feel and hers, that's literally it', so a label just complicated things, however this label does make the most sense out of all the other ones I've seen. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Storm_leopardcat Posted January 13, 2023 Share Posted January 13, 2023 On 12/23/2022 at 7:51 PM, Arden said: If I'm being honest, I'm aware of the fact that it's gonna be hard to explain the attraction I have towards my friend (since it's neither romantic, platonic or sexual), and I do love her a lot and we've been talking about getting into a queer platonic relationship for a while now but the alterous attraction is the most accurate description to what I feel. It's emotional, since I couldn't care less what she looked like, and it's just I love her more than platonic and more deeply than platonic but not in the romantic sense. The romantic feelings never made sense to me. Thank u sm for that, again, I'm not actively trying to label my feelings for anyone since I reached a point about 2 months ago when I was like 'ya know what, it's my business what I feel and hers, that's literally it', so a label just complicated things, however this label does make the most sense out of all the other ones I've seen. You are welcome, Arden. I am glad I could help you out on this! Not to say I know what it's like to experience alterous attraction, but that sounds accurate to me! 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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