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How do I fully accept im aromantic and will likely never end up in a romantic relationship?


Guest Anonymous
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Guest Anonymous

When I found out I was aromantic, it kinda hurt a bit tbh. As someone who loves romance stories and would love to get married, and realizing I probably just wont due to a near complete lack of romantic attraction and interest in people. Technically, I'd be grayromantic, but I've only felt romantic attraction once in my whole life so I just call myself aro anyways. I really, really wanna love someone romantically, but I just physically can't and it hurts. I know its barely been a month since the discovery but still... It feels a bit isolating, especially since even if I find someone nice enough, I probably won't be attracted to them in the way they'd want me to be. (I am also asexual) 

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i'm so sorry to hear you're struggling with this, i'm also new to being aro, and what has helped me is thinking about what i think i want from a relationship, such as skinship and comfort etc., it's different for everyone. while you may not experience romantic attraction, you could be in a queer platonic relationship which (depending on who is in the relationship) could include everything in a traditional romantic relationship minus the actual romantic part. society itself has molded us to think of certain things as purely romantic things, hugs and so on, which can harm us aro folks as it seems that a lot of doors have closed, but they havent! 

it's always going to be tricky especially when you enjoy romance stories etc. (i do too, its hard!) but just remember, you are you, and you are the only one holding your reigns back, try to remove things traditionally perceived as romantic from being out of bounds, and maybe keep an eye open for queer platonic relationships (QPRs) as they miht be just the thing you're looking for!

best of luck! (^^)

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Guest Alex

You could be cupioromantic! Cupioromantic individuals experience little to no romantic attraction and desire a romantic relationship.

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I completely sympathise, I went through a similar thing. For me, what really helped was focusing on the other relationships in my life. My most important friendships are stronger than ever, my community is growing, I'm taking every opportunity to connect with people & get involved in projects. It's helped me realise that the spouse-shaped hole that I was afraid of isn't so important.

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