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Coming Out?


ClearSkiesAhear

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So I have a friend who I want to come out to.  I’m not worried about them accepting me being AroAce, I trust them more than I trust anyone else ever.  The only thing stopping me is anxiety about HOW THE HECK DO I COME OUT.

fun fact: both times I’ve come out to people in the past, it was a complete accident.  I have no idea how to do it intentionally.

How do I just casually bring up “Hey, guess what!  I don’t experience sexual or romantic attraction!”?

And the timing is rather unfortunate because it’s February and that stuff is on people’s mind, but I that’s also part of the reason I was to do it now.

I could use some just generic advice on how I might go about this and/or how to get over the anxiety long enough to just do it.

 

edit a few months later: I did it via spontaneous text and they were very amazing about it.  Also turns out they’re also ace, so they get it.

Edited by ClearSkiesAhear
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Not sure. If romance comes up in conversation a lot then you will have plenty of opportunity to slip in a little comment like 'oh, I don't really care about that' or something similar.

If the problem is anxiety then to be honest what you need is not so much advice on how to come out but rather to read up on how to deal with that anxiety in general.

Then once you are more comfortable leading a conversation with your friends the difficulty of coming out to them may be lessened.

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Fun fact: Feburary is not only valentines' day month and black history month, it's also arospec awareness month!

As roboticanary said, try slipping it into a conversation, maybe mentioning that you don't understand it or don't want a romantic relationship. You may also find it easier to come out online, in texts or emails or something.

Try running through the scenario in your head, thinking about what you will say and how your friend my respond.


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