simplyaro Posted January 17, 2021 Share Posted January 17, 2021 (edited) I have poor social skills, even at my age, and I need help. As I'm here, I'm obviously ARO. I'm female and have a gay male squish. I won't have the opportunity to see him for a few months, but I'm thinking ahead. I'm a (roller) coaster enthusiast and the squish is this guy who I met in the online coaster social media community; Our conservsations started when he responded to comments I made on the content he posts. Over the summer, we met up at Hersheypark and hung out there together a few times in 2020. It was the most amazing time and I really adore him like you wouldn't believe. We're planning to hang out at amusement parks many times this year. We have a lot of things in common -classic rock, horror movies to name a few, not just roller coasters but that's a huge passion for the both of us. I never before had a friend (not counting online) that I had much in common with and he fits the bill of the friend I always dreamt of. I have no interest in dating and he doesn't want to anytime for the foreseeable future for his own reasons. Also, obviously we couldn't be more due to mixed orientations. All I want is to just have lunch/dinner with him and talk about our common interests. I really don't like going back to my hotel room and eating dinner alone when the park closes in the evening- would be very nice to have the company. How do I go about asking without him thinking it's a date? Edited January 17, 2021 by simplyaro Forgot detail Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Erederyn Posted January 17, 2021 Share Posted January 17, 2021 Nice that you found a friend you like so much! Perhaps you could say something along the lines of "It would be nice to have the company of a friend, would you like to have dinner with me?"/"It would be nice to have dinner with a friend, would you like to join me?" I would say that's pretty clear that you mean it platonically and not as a date. Good luck! 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rolo Posted January 19, 2021 Share Posted January 19, 2021 It sounds kind of like you've already discussed relationships if you know he isn't doesn't want one right now? If you have both previously mentioned a general lack of interest in dating, and he's knows that you know he is gay, then there's no reason he would think it was a date. It's perfectly normal for friends to go out for a meal together. Just ask the same way you would ask to meet up for anything else. Personally my normal turn of phrase for such a situation would be: "Fancy getting something to eat after the park?" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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