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Natkat
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Hello

 

I'm a scandinavian from the Facebook group, Aven, and part of many other aro groups. 

I don't have a specific label on me cause I think I fit too many labels. but I usunaly go by aro, gray-aro or litro. (since I am unsure if I ever had felt romantic attraction or not, but just know that if so then I have never felt for someone where it was reciprocated.) I also identify as queer/bisexual which was confusing because I for many years thought only asexuals could be aroO.o

 

I get alot of squishes, and have a past with alot of people getting chrushes on me (its a never ending tragedy since it makes me so repulsive lol)

I am not out to so many people, and only a handfull of other aros or friends knows about me, still I am trying to do abit of aro activism and visability, I have done transactivism in my country in the past and general knows a great amount of activist of various kinds, but aro-activism and awareness is a very different experience.

 

As hobby i'm creative and enjoy writing stories or draw,

I also study japanese and hope one day to get fluid in the language.

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Welcome! It's nice seeing people from the Facebook group joining :)

 

Also, rock on with all your activism :) I've never had it in me to be loud and proud with any of my identities, but it always warms my heart to hear about people trying to make a difference. Depending on how life goes, I may end up being somewhat public about some of my identities just because there's complete radio static concerning what to expect navigating my career path with the identities I have, but even that sounds really daunting. I hope your activism goes well and positively impacts the world around you!

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Hello NatKat!  I can totally relate to what you've written about having lots of people get crushes on you, but feeling repulsed by it.   It's kind of funny actually, because when I identified as straight by default and thought I might actually like a boyfriend, no one was really interested in me.  But then I get to college and start to realize how complete repulsed I am by getting involved in romance and suddenly I'm on the receiving end of so many crushes.  Some people I know IRL tell me it's because I'm not trying to get a boyfriend, so I'm super relaxed around boys and that makes them like me.  But if you ever find more helpful advice than that, let me know, cause I'd like ti to stop! xD

 

Also, I agree with Mezzo Forte that any activism you're doing is great!  I can't be out in real life which really limits me, and I have a lot of respect for the people who are out there doing more than I ever could.  Keep up the good work!

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5 minutes ago, deltaX said:

 It's kind of funny actually, because when I identified as straight by default and thought I might actually like a boyfriend, no one was really interested in me. 

 

Wow, I used that same exact logic and even the same exact terminology to identify myself before I knew about asexuality/aromanticism. Honestly, realizing that I wasn't necessarily anything by default was the most liberating thing that discovering asexuality/aromanticism did for me.

 

I never really had to deal with people getting crushes on me in college. I had the rare guy come on a bit strong while I was riding the bus (and man, that's awkward), but I guess I was good at keeping my musician peers as simply my peers. (I don't really talk about deep personal stuff with my peers because I have a better time talking music with them for the most part.) The last person to hit on me was probably 11 years old, and that was uncomfortable on so many levels (considering that I'm 22 and have both a niece and nephew).

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25 minutes ago, Mezzo Forte said:

Welcome! It's nice seeing people from the Facebook group joining :)

 

Also, rock on with all your activism :) I've never had it in me to be loud and proud with any of my identities, but it always warms my heart to hear about people trying to make a difference. Depending on how life goes, I may end up being somewhat public about some of my identities just because there's complete radio static concerning what to expect navigating my career path with the identities I have, but even that sounds really daunting. I hope your activism goes well and positively impacts the world around you!

 

More like proud and very quit lol.. I dont like the activism that requires media attention or really harsh caises and also I dont have the spoon for it anymore because it makes me really stressed. I have done a few "public things" but its not really what im most interesteed in + it also makes it much harder being aro if im working with the press, so I rather just do small everyday things once in a while when I feel like something is needed and I have the strengt to put myself into it, so that means helping other with task or doing stuff myself. painting banners, making pamphlets, writing blog doing art, arranging meetings, and baking cakes, is pretty much all I do.. oh yeah and then im working on my book.

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21 minutes ago, deltaX said:

 But if you ever find more helpful advice than that, let me know, cause I'd like ti to stop! xD

 

Also, I agree with Mezzo Forte that any activism you're doing is great!  I can't be out in real life which really limits me, and I have a lot of respect for the people who are out there doing more than I ever could.  Keep up the good work!

 

 

I think the reason I have so many people getting a chrush on me is because I dont have this "this is only for friends or romantic interest zone" like many people have. Like I hold hands with some of my friends, or bath naked in a bathtub with others, and have sleep overs with a third, and travel with a forth, so I often get to a point of confussion because "we must be dating if im doing this with x" also I am usunally friendly and sensual and prefer sex with people I know well, + have a rather young look, so many think im this "cute sweet guy next door who is waiting for the one stereotype" ARG!!!!!

(they always get surprized when they notice thats not the case)

 

Now because this has happent so much I started to be abit axious when people seams "too friendly too quick" -__- sign*

but good advice? I dont know. currently I have problem due to illness so I am often at the hospital and talk in detail about it about the nasty threatment I do, also my mom is also ill and often has dierrea, it may help on how many find me dateable? =P but I wouldnt recomend it. being sick sucks alot. 

 

 

 

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Ahh, that's the problem with being a female in a male-dominated major pretty much all my close college friends are guys. I like the diversity it's added to my friend group (in high school I was almost exclusively friends with girls), but it's lead to some awkward situtations.

 

One day I think it would be great if the world got to a point where the fact that you're opposite gendered means you have to  possibility of liking them romantically, but that's a rant for a different time.

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Regardless of the kind of activism work you do, rock on. :) I'm glad that you can use some of your artistic skills to help out in some way. Being a musician doesn't leave me a lot of options in that regard unless I collaborated with a lyricist and composed something related to activism, but I'm not much of a composer and I write way too slowly to get anything out in a timely manner. 

 

I'm still in the closet about being ftm, so people usually see me as the only AFAB percussionist studying music at my school. Lots of them are already dating, engaged, or married, and one of them has three kids, so I don't have to worry about them, and even the single ones don't try anything on me. I guess I give off an "I'd rather be practicing percussion" kind of vibe :P 

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19 minutes ago, Mezzo Forte said:

Regardless of the kind of activism work you do, rock on. :) I'm glad that you can use some of your artistic skills to help out in some way. Being a musician doesn't leave me a lot of options in that regard unless I collaborated with a lyricist and composed something related to activism, but I'm not much of a composer and I write way too slowly to get anything out in a timely manner. 

 

I'm still in the closet about being ftm, so people usually see me as the only AFAB percussionist studying music at my school. Lots of them are already dating, engaged, or married, and one of them has three kids, so I don't have to worry about them, and even the single ones don't try anything on me. I guess I give off an "I'd rather be practicing percussion" kind of vibe :P 

1

Musical are usually used in social-event type of activism.

Like support-parties,manifestations,regular party/after-parties, art exhibitions etc, so its diffently also needed if you one day decide to perform. I dont think music need to be "activism minded" sure its cool if you have a demonstration about something to make a song about it, and also opposite if you made a song on a transevent with a transphobic lyrics would be really off, But I think alot of times people just want some entertainment so people can go to the event or have a good time, and entertainment are often expensive, and many people doing events are not that rich so artist who volunteer are often wellcomed (being part of the minority tend to be a +), at least thats my experience, but sure it would all depend on the people doing the event and what type of event it is. I also play abit music but I haven't preform to any event. generally because I would have to play solo and I am too shy for such a role.  

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