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Posted (edited)

Guys I need help

So there's a girl who happens to be one of my best friends who really likes me and and I think is expecting me to ask her to be my girlfriend, and I'd be fine with a queerplatonic where she thinks "oh yeah dating" and I think "oh yeah friends that can hold hands and shit" but I don't want her to think that I'm thinking we are dating dating.

like if she said we were dating I wouldn't have an issue but I think that in her mind its super romantic.

what do I do help.

 

EDIT:

Ok so I get that but I don't want her to hate me, I really care about her, what if she hates me after :<

Edited by Cavetowns_fkin_awesome
Posted

You have a conversation with her. You clearly lay out your feelings and wants and let her decide if that's something she wants as well. There's nothing you can do but talk it out.

  • Like 2
Posted

So its funny, but the advice for this is the same advice you would give if someone wanted to ask someone else out and was worried about it runing the friendship (or something similar).

Talk to them about it

Whats the alternative? You dont talk to them, you never get any closer, she ends up getting upset because she thinks you're stringing her along or worse, you do start dating but she gets upset because she finds out you dont think of it that way or you end up feeling trapped doing romantic stuff you dont want to do. Whats the worst that comes from talking to her? You come to the decision you both want different stuff and stay friends.

  • Like 1
Posted (edited)

Yeah I agree with @Sili and @Neon, just explain your feelings to her (there is nothing wrong with doing it over text if you feel like it'll help you organise your thoughts better) and be super clear about what you mean. Good luck

edit

Just to be more clear I meant that it's probably better to talk it out in person as there's less room for miscommunication that can sometimes happen over the internet, but as someone who can't brain properly during conversations about feelings I find it easier to write it down

Edited by allhailtheglowcloud
Clarification
  • Like 2

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