Hello!

[loveloses]

My name is Mickey, I'm aro & bisexual! Hoping to make some new friends.

I'm especially hoping to find other aro people who are not polyamorous. I love and respect polyamorous people and I am always down to chat with & make friends with polyam people!!

But, for me personally, the only thing I can imagine that's scarier than dating one person is dating multiple people! So being around esclusively polyam aro people doesn't help me feel less alone as an aro person.

Edited July 18, 2023 by loveloses

[HelloThere]

50 minutes ago, loveloses said:

My name is Mickey, I'm aro & bisexual! Hoping to make some new friends.

I'm especially hoping to find other aro people who are not polyamorous. I love and respect polyamorous people and I am always down to chat with & make friends with polyam people!!

But, for me personally, the only thing I can imagine that's scarier than dating one person is dating multiple people! So being around esclusively polyam aro people doesn't help me feel less alone as an aro person.

Tbh dating doesn’t sound sucky until I realize what’s expected of me. It doesn’t sound bad, I just wouldn’t care if I did or didn’t do that.

[Jot-Aro Kujo]

Nice to meet you. For what it’s worth, being polyam doesn’t necessarily mean dating; I’m aro and polyam and I don’t date anyone. For me, I consider myself polyamorous because as a non-partnering aro, I already exist outside the structure of monogamy and have no reason to limit my activities to one person at a time. 
Of course, I’m not saying you have to be polyamorous. I’m just clarifying because I think you might be misunderstanding a little bit, which is fair. 

[loveloses]

23 minutes ago, Jot-Aro Kujo said:

Nice to meet you. For what it’s worth, being polyam doesn’t necessarily mean dating; I’m aro and polyam and I don’t date anyone. For me, I consider myself polyamorous because as a non-partnering aro, I already exist outside the structure of monogamy and have no reason to limit my activities to one person at a time. 
Of course, I’m not saying you have to be polyamorous. I’m just clarifying because I think you might be misunderstanding a little bit, which is fair. 

Hey this is the kind of stuff that makes me feel isolated and alone in aro spaces actually!!!

I explored polyamory when I was figuring out my queer identity and like I said, I don't personally find it freeing or any less inherently amanormative than monogamy.

so quite frankly It does feel like you're trying to force me to identify with or relate to your expierences as a polyamorous person in a way that makes me wonder if I can be accepted here as an aromantic person who isn't opposed to monogamy and would want monogamy if I decided to enter a QPR.

I hope people will respect my boundaries and personal identity and not try to explain polyamory to me further.

I know what it is, I'm glad it's good for people and people who are helped hy it have access to the concept and a community.

Polyamory is not and will never be for me, just like monogamy will never be for some other people.

1 hour ago, HelloThere said:

Tbh dating doesn’t sound sucky until I realize what’s expected of me. It doesn’t sound bad, I just wouldn’t care if I did or didn’t do that.

I'm kind of in the same boat. I don't mind the activity of dating & I like the ideal of finding a platonic QPR when I'm older and want to settle down, but I don't feel like I'm missing anything by not dating and I hate the pressure that exists to date.

[Isa1116]

Hi, I'm isa and I hope you have a good time here! :)

3 hours ago, loveloses said:

I'm especially hoping to find other aro people who are not polyamorous. I love and respect polyamorous people and I am always down to chat with & make friends with polyam people!!

Are all the aro people you meet polyamorous? I'm not, at least I don't think so. I've never been in a relationship and don't plan on it so... But yea, I'm aro-spec that isn't polyamorous :).

[Jot-Aro Kujo]

1 hour ago, loveloses said:

Hey this is the kind of stuff that makes me feel isolated and alone in aro spaces actually!!!

I explored polyamory when I was figuring out my queer identity and like I said, I don't personally find it freeing or any less inherently amanormative than monogamy.

so quite frankly It does feel like you're trying to force me to identify with or relate to your expierences as a polyamorous person in a way that makes me wonder if I can be accepted here as an aromantic person who isn't opposed to monogamy and would want monogamy if I decided to enter a QPR.

I hope people will respect my boundaries and personal identity and not try to explain polyamory to me further.

I know what it is, I'm glad it's good for people and people who are helped hy it have access to the concept and a community.

Polyamory is not and will never be for me, just like monogamy will never be for some other people.

I didn't say you had to be polyamorous, and I'm sorry I made you feel that way. I support you fully and I hope you can do whatever makes you most comfortable. I just wanted to make sure you understood, since aro polyamory is not the same as allo polyamory, but I suppose I misunderstood your understanding. I apologize for making you uncomfortable, let me know if there's something I can do better.

[loveloses]

18 minutes ago, Isa1116 said:

Hi, I'm isa and I hope you have a good time here! :)

Are all the aro people you meet polyamorous? I'm not, at least I don't think so. I've never been in a relationship and don't plan on it so... But yea, I'm aro-spec that isn't polyamorous :).

Most of them are, actually! TBF so are a lot of alloromantic people I meet, lol

Nice to meet you isa! :)