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Posted

Hello, For the past three years I have identified myself as an asexual lesbian but as of recently, I have been questioning whether I am just somewhere on the aro spectrum. I've only ever had one crush on a person in my entire life. However, I never pursued a relationship with this person. I liked them a lot but whenever it seemed like we were getting into relationship territory I would panic and it just always felt wrong. I've always loved love and have perceived it as one of the best things a person could experience, but it seems whenever it is presented I just can't accept it. 

Presently, there is a person that I am friends with who very obviously has a crush on me. I don't know how I feel about them though. I talk to them a lot, but I don't know if I feel that romantic pull. It is stressing me out because I feel like I am leading this person on and the last thing I want to do is hurt them. 

Any insight into the situation would be appreciated. Thank you 

  • Like 2
Posted

I've been in a similar situation before! It sounds like you may very well be somewhere on the aro spectrum to me. I know how it feels to love the idea of love, but freak out once it becomes reality. 

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  • 2 weeks later...
Posted

That sounds very interesting, Ive expirience this before aswell. If you do want to know how you feel about said person. Imagine yourself being in a relationship with them. like what it would be like to hold hands, cuddle or kiss. Then go on from there. If you are uncomfotable with relatiosnhip things like that but still want a relationship then ask yourself..."would I want to go on a date with said person?" "Would I want to get married to said person?" "Would I want to call them my significant other?"  

 

Hope this helped!

  • Like 1
Posted

No matter your romantic orientation it's ok that you don't feel romantic attraction to your friend. If you are afraid of leading them on tell them you're not romantically attracted to them, either straight forward or indirectly by saying you don't have any crushes or such on anyone currently.

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