Weird Crushes? or even crush?

[BloodyBlood]

{ waring : Need some advice , Please dont be mad i deeply apologize for this topic , not much about aromantic but still deeply apologize ;-; }hi! so uhhhhhh im new in this place and my first time that i made account in this site and i wanted say i deeply apologize if i wasted your time or etc i deeply deeply apologize soo srry ;-; sooo i had some weird question and i did not know where to ask since im not aromantic asexual anymore and has changed into heteroflexible { Bisexual } so, here we go....

when i see people { in Online game } and for example i have some close friends or people who i think they are good people, idk and think how they are and i think hmm... wish i could be her/him girl friend, lol ;-; but when i more think i just like to call people my girl/boy etc, i like romance norms like kissing { in game } and cuddling, hugging etc but im not really into relationship, even if they want from me i would help them find some romantic partner the other thing is im too jealous about everything so i cant really say im just jealous about my crush.. uhhh my question so messed up, and in other hand im kinda satisfied with my current life, but hm when i imagine about future like marriage etc im more indifferent, okay but not my wish i prefer just fantasies wich i dont really like to even think about it clearly, but once i was with my mom in some hotel and nearby there was wedding, and i thought i wanted say { ohhh okay lets imagine now me and you { my mom } is wedding XD } this is what past my mind but of course i dont like to marry its use less for me in my opinion .. so ye im totally confused anyway i deeply apologize if it was so rude/openly and etc im so srry but i did not know where to ask Q-Q and ngl this is one of the rare time i ever been honest with myself, and the other thing if my friend or crush or what ever im not sure get boy/girl/ etc friend i get a bit jelly and jealous and think like this : how about me -n- { something like the siblings that one of them get one candy but other one no} or in other time i saw this guy in game he was sad cause he broke with his girl and i hate to say this but the things that past in my mind { wanna i be ur girl XD ? } i did not say but i thought it was something like chances how ever thats time i did not know how does romantic relationship even work but i also enjoy people crushing me { in game if it happened in real life i may be a bit freak out idk why just the thing it happened in moment i feel like that when i fantasies } and i guess i like that popular, wanted feeling maybe cause i feel like its the most level of liking { wich i dont think it is right... } and when they crush on me i think { OHHH YES WE CAN BE GOOD FRIEND YESH YESH YESH } this is what past my mind, sooo yes. im completely confused ;] anyway i million time deeply apologize for long and my waste of time comment/topic QnQ

Edited August 23, 2021 by BloodyBlood

[Hellishfish]

First of all, as politely as possible, stop apologizing. You have nothing to be sorry about. You’re here asking a question, seeking advice. That’s precisely what a forum like this is for. Don’t apologize for using the forum as its intended to be used :)

secondly, your question. I won’t lie and say that I fully understand what you’re asking, but I’ll take a stab. If you feel infatuation, that is, you feel a desire within you to be romantically involved with a person, then you would most likely not be aromantic. But I would base your judgment on past relationships. How strong have your feelings been for non-sexual love? I suppose that would be the question you would need to ask yourself.