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Gender stereotyping and clothes


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I want some advice on counteracting gender stereotypes/accepted fashion on clothing and presentation. Basically I feel like there is pressure to dress and present a certain way.

From family or even some friends (tho I ended up cutting of one of those people for a different reason) who don't support the way. Sure they can't pressure you into stuff but the stuff they say it kinda seeps in after a while.

And the thing about bot dressing well enough gets to me, like I would never dress the way others say I should I find it disgusting tbh (no offense to them just to me) but I feel like I could do better so I internalise the feeling.

I don't have any friends who would help me locate clothing tho to my taste. I guess there is online but idk the most popular sites don't have a lot I like to my gender at least tho I could get the opposite sex clothing (I guess clothing is neutral technically) but there is a problem with sizes and I dunno about bagging clothing, and it doesn't necessarily mean I will like it. I guess if I was clever I could make clothing but nah haha. Online is kinda risky tho cuz things don't fit and my parents dun like the idea of returning stuff for some reason, I got some cheap tshirt online b4 but its way too small and weird fabric.

I also dunno about spending so much for something that in the end is just there to cover my body ya know lol. I guess I wouldn't mind paying more if it means a fairer wage for the person who made it and something that lasts longer (throwaway fashion sucks) but I dont really care about designer brands for the sake of it. I guess tho maybe I should if it means I could get something but I feel like people wont care either way and I guess I will still get pressure maybe even more if I dressed how I liked.

With make up I know many countries don't or are much lower on it however I see many women in my country absolutely caked in it.

I have not worn such before apart from once a bit of lipstick and eye stuff for a fashion show but not because I wanted but not more than that. I don't really care generally but it kinda is annoying how judgemental people are or forcing their tastes on you.

I don't need to wear it fortunately for my job, but I would never want to either for any job lol. I think it's sad tho that its almost seen as required in many cases, like do all female entrepreneurs really have to dress that way like surely beauty is not the asset they are trying to sell in that case. It's also very double standard and often doesn't work the other way. It would be fine as optional just not compulsory or pretend optional. I wouldn't like to go to a dressy party or whatever either for that reason.

I feel like I am not allowed to dress how I like and be who I wanna be get what I mean? It sucks on top of everything else I have to think about. I guess it's a very minor thing but it's on my mind and it's annoying me a lot. Btw i don't want to dress weirdly or anything just simple is fine. It's just kinda hard for me I dunno why, even when I lived alone I didnt enjoy or really look for anything and I feel trapped and even more now, you cant even go out and buy anything. 


Edited by mewix
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I understand how you feel.  As a non-binary person, I've always had a rough time with social expectations around clothes and cosmetics.  Being shoved into a dress for formal occasions was hell for me.  Clothes shopping with my parents was also less than enjoyable, since I knew that wandering over to the men's side of a shop wouldn't go over well.

Oddly enough, I've gotten more comfortable with some traditionally feminine things as I've come to understand my identity more.  I'm fine wearing skirts on hot days, for one thing- they're just more physically comfortable when you live somewhere with humid summers.

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