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help on non-romantic relationship


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Hi everyone, it's me again, haha. 

As you may (or may not) know, this is my second post here on this forum so i'm still familiarizing myself with some things. Sorry for anything. 

My first post was about me and my ex-bf, we dated for a few months but as we ended identifying ourselves in the aro spectrum, we broke up. 
The things is i still shee him as more than as friends, and i love the idea of ''being together'' with him in a non-romantic way, but still being together. I just don't know if he would be willing too or how uncomfortable he would be with it. I don't have many friends to talk about this, the one i had ended up showing herself as a very arophobic person and we don't talk anymore. But finding this forum really made me happy in several aspects, so i wanted try to find a way to approach him about this without look like i'm pressing him or anything. 

I tend to have a tremendous difficulty explaining what i'm feeling/thinking and i don't want to let anythings misunderstood. just want to find the most...subtle way? to talk about it. 

Thanks for reading until here. haha

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Hello again ^^, it is I the coffee addict. So...I am sorry about you having the horrible experience of finding out your friend was arophobic. Well you are better off without someone like that in your life, friends should not judge, but instead help one another. Now, on to the topic of this thread, if you have a difficulty in speaking to him, you can always write your thoughts on paper and give it to him. (I did this with my friends before and they understood me a lot more cuz I am much better at writing what I want than expressing it on the moment) Now I don't have to do this, but that method helped me before. This way you will have a certain degree of confidence in that you are communicating what you want. Now, I would talk to him about wanting something more than friends, but you have to leave clear what is it that you want. Does it include romantic gestures (i.e. hand holding/ kissing/ cuddling) and to what degree; does sex is allowed (yes/no); dates (to what degree); pet names (for me I don't like them but that is me); (insert any other theme to discuss). This is what I can offer, I can give more, but I think that you know him better and can navigate the situation. Cheers, and break a leg (drama joke ^^)

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