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Wanting to be more than "just friends" as an aro



Hi everyone. So I've had this friend for about a month. She seems to enjoy my company much more than anyone else I know. She seems to be as much of a loner as me and we've started hanging out for at least an hour a day while we wait for class to start. She knows I identify as aromantic, and she's pansexual and I usually get the impression she would much rather play video games than go out with someone romantically. I have a very strong squish on her, but I'm not sure if she even knows what a squish is and I'm a little afraid that telling her I have any kind of feelings for her could make things weird between us. Today we were talking about a plan we have, and her mom asked if she was going to be alone and she said she would be with a friend. She clarified that it wasn't a date because I'm aromantic and that we're "just friends." However, I feel like she would be the best possible zucchini for me and I'm not sure how to tell her that but I'm also worried that if I don't tell her for too long that I feel anything stronger than what "just friends" means to most people it could make it harder to become zucchinis. Does anyone have any advice about the best way to handle this situation?

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I would start by discussing topics related to aromanticism and queerplatonic relationships with her. Tell her what a queerplatonic/zucchini relationship is and why many aromantic people object to terms like "just friends." That way you can gauge her reaction, and see if being your or anyone's zucchini would be something she would be interested in. If she seems receptive to the idea you can ask her if she wants to be your zucchini, and if she doesn't seem receptive you don't even have to ask.

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