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idk am I aro?


lila
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so idk if I’m aro or not but I remember having crushes when I was little (2nd and 4th Grade) but I only remember two crushes and I haven’t had any since. I’m kinda confused bc I’m 17 now but i desperately want to date, but I can’t make myself have a crush. My bro was the one who suggested I might be asexual and I know it may take time to adjust to this but I  want to date. I have a friend that’s aro and we can relate to a lot of things but idk ugh

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So here's the thing.

 

There's a lot of grey area with this aro stuff. There are people who very rarely get crushes (grayromantics), people who don't experience romantic attraction but still want a relationship (cupioromantics) and a whole host of other orientations on the aromantic spectrum. You may be one of these. I know I definitely wanted someone to answer the question for me when I was questioning, but you just gotta see what echos inside you. I found the post You Might Be Aro If helped a lot. This might also help:

 

 

Good luck! 

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It's entirely possible that your crushes you had as a little one were actually squishes (friend crushes essentially) or you may be arospec but not aro (so greyro, quoiro etc. as the post above says). Also I'm not sure if you mean it literally or not, but despite what many aros think before they start questioning, crushes are not something you 'make' yourself have. Either way, know that adjusting and accepting ourselves is hard for all of us, so if you turn out to be arospec you're not alone.

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