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Ettina

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Posts posted by Ettina

    Aros With Autism/Aspergers

    in Off Topic

    Posted

    On 11/30/2016 at 1:08 PM, EveryZig said:

    (Really it makes me feel very lucky to be aro and grey-ace, as feeling a need for romance or partnered sex while having the social difficulties of the autistic spectrum seems like it would be awful.)

     

    Me too!

    Cupioromantic quiz

    in Aromantic Discussion

    Posted

    I've been questioning my romantic orientation, and one label I came across was cupioromantic - someone who doesn't feel romantic attraction but strongly desire a romantic relationship. I'm still trying to sort out exactly what that means and if it fits me.

     

    During my search, I came across this AVEN thread. This person asked cupioromantics and aromantics to fill out a quiz that she came up with. Here are the questions and my answers.

     

    Quote

    1. "I enjoy fictional romantic relationships and would like to experience the same kinds of feelings"

     

    Usually not. There are a few fictional relationships I like, but most I hate, to the point where I usually won't even try a book if it has two MCs of the opposite sex described on the back blurb. Among the few I've liked, I don't really see myself in them. But then I don't tend to identify with fiction in general.

     

    Quote

    2. "I like nearly everything about romantic relationships but do not experience romantic attraction"

     

    I like some things and dislike other things. I don't think I experience romantic attraction though.

     

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    3. "I would like to be in a romantic relationship, just not with anyone I have ever met"

     

    Yes. The only people who've shown any interest in me have been asexual-denying, overly pushy heterosexual guys, and the idea of being romantically involved with them is horrific. But I'd like if I met someone compatible.

     

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    4. "I love the idea of romance but I can't deal with it in real life"

     

    Never had a romantic relationship, so I don't know.

     

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    5. "I would like to be in a romantic relationship for practical reasons (not feelings)"

     

    I'd like a co-parent when I have a child (I'm planning on having one), and as an autistic person with independent living issues, living with a supportive person would be very practical. But I also want someone for emotional support and companionship.

     

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    6. "I think I would like it if someone had romantic feelings for me"

     

    Maybe? If I didn't like them as a person, then no. But if I did, I think I'd like that. I've never been in that situation though.

     

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    7. "I would be fine in a romantic relationship or a QPR"

     

    Either one, yes.

     

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    8. "I would like to know what it's like to experience romantic attraction"

     

    For scientific purposes, yes. But I don't think I'd like to actually feel it. I hate losing control.

     

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    9. "I'd rather be romantic than aromantic"

     

    I'd like to be somewhere in between, I think. Or else an aromantic person who is also a loner with no real interest in forming any kind of close relationship.

     

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    10. "I can't imagine spending the rest of my life as an aromantic person"

     

    I can, but it makes me a bit sad. Especially once my parents are dead, I'm afraid I'll be lonely.

     

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    11. "Being in a romantic relationship would help me attain other goals in my life"

     

    Yes, definitely.

     

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    12. "I think dating sounds like fun"

     

    Sometimes it does. But it also sounds unpleasant in a lot of ways - being rejected, figuring out how to reject them, date rape, worrying about what they think, having incompatible dreams, etc.

     

    What about you guys?

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