ink

sennkestra, I've been thinking about your reply all day and I think you got it exactly right. I think that kind of relationship - shallow-ish but there - is exactly what I need. Now to find a friend to cohabitate with... ?

I don't know how much of this was ace and how much was aro (and how much of a difference there is to me) but I never understood the kids in my class who got nervous around the "opposite" gender or things like that. Celebrity crushes, though, were and still are the most baffling to me. I don't experience romance but I can sort of understand it; I don't understand sexual attraction but I know it exists. But for celebrities? People you don't know and never will? When people asked about celebrity crushes, I always assumed they were just discussing which celebrities they found aesthetically pleasing.

I feel the same way. I love fiction about crushes (slightly embarrassed to admit that my fave fanfic genre by far is mutual pining) but the few romantic relationships I tried in real life made me stressed and anxious and miserable. Maybe we just need more aro friends.

I responded with one other person not sharing sleeping space but I think I might be OK with two or so other people not sharing a sleeping space. It depends on the people, though, and as so far I haven't even found 1 person to cohabitate with it's all rather theoretical.

I've been identifying as aro for about two years and as arospec for a few years before that, and I've been happy with that. While I knew about the existence of queerplatonic relationships, I've always said that I'd only enter one if I found the right person. Lately, though, I've been craving more intimate relationships. Not romantic or sexual, but I've been finding myself wishing I had a person, someone to share my life with. I haven't been feeling lonely, exactly - I'm still content to do things alone - but I've found myself wishing for more. I'm not sure if this is because more and more of peers are partnering up (I'm 25, this has been going on for a while, but I think it's gotten more extreme lately) or if I just haven't been spending enough time with my friends (whom I love dearly) or if something about me has changed. Am I just being affected by amatonormativity? I don't even know how I would find a queerplatonic partner. It's not like dating - I don't think I could make that sort of connection with someone without first forming a natural friendship. I have one friend who I would have once wanted to be in a relationship with, but we've drifted apart, and other than her I've never felt close enough with someone that I actually wanted to live with them. What do you think? I'd love to hear other people's opinions and experiences.