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Aromantic problems (for me)


aparklover0911

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I'm not sure what kind of issues we're talking about, but I do struggle with self acceptance a lot. The thing is I know I'm on the aromantic spectrum, probably at its end, because I don't think I experience any romantic attraction, but because of being favorable towards the concept of romance, I don't really want to accept it. It's like I know it's what I am, but I can' really comprehend it...?? It's hard to explain without sounding like I'm denying every single word I write, so I'm sorry if it's messy.

Edited by Keith
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yeah that is kind of what I mean but... have either of you read the book loveless?? if you haven't that's ok, but I do recommend it as a coming out as Aro-ace to friends. Any ways, I was also thinking along the lines of " I dated two girls because it was custom for people in my school to have a relationship, but even as I did that it didn't feel right and ended up just being platonic-relationship, and end the end the person that I was "experimenting" with actually had real feelings for me and because of that, they didn't feel the feelings reciprocated, and ended the friendship altogether and when all of my friends are friends with her they all will tell her if I come out to them and then I will receive hate from all of them, and then they will make my life a living nightmare... how do I go about fixing that??

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Ah, I see. That's a really difficult situation. Fortunately, I've not had too much trouble like that, but I'm also pretty selective about the people I keep around in my life.

Tbh, if your "friends" are the type of people to out you without consent and bully or turn against you for your identity, then they're just not your friends. It's easier said than done, but I would suggest distancing yourself from this group and freeing yourself to make some real friends. I'm so sorry you feel trapped and threatened.

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9 hours ago, aparklover0911 said:

have either of you read the book loveless?? if you haven't that's ok, but I do recommend it as a coming out as Aro-ace to friends.

I have, but nonetheless thanks for the recommendation! :D

3 hours ago, hemogoblin said:

Tbh, if your "friends" are the type of people to out you without consent and bully or turn against you for your identity, then they're just not your friends. It's easier said than done, but I would suggest distancing yourself from this group and freeing yourself to make some real friends. I'm so sorry you feel trapped and threatened.

I wholeheartedly agree with this. Your friends should never out you.

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