Am I Aromantic or Just Angry?

[br0k3np0rc3lain]

I've always had relationship problems. All of my past relationship have been short and toxic. I'm always getting rejected. Nobody seems to love me. 

I've started to think that love, in any form, was a made up concept. But I'm just confusing myself because I have [or at least I thought I have] felt love. But maybe I was just in love with the idea of being cared for and listened too and things like that. A friend said I might be Cupioromantic but that doesn't fit either. Nothing has given me any answers. 

Am I on the aroace spectrum or am I just mad that nobody will ever want me?

[hemogoblin]

This isn't a question anyone can answer for you. Maybe you're one or the other, maybe you're both, maybe you're both right now but might not be later and/or haven't always been both.

Here is what makes someone aromantic:

• They feel aromantic is a useful label for them, and/or
• They want to ID as aromantic and/or they take comfort in ID'ing as aromantic

Regardless, it sounds like taking a break from dating and just focusing on you and your healing would be a good way to sort through your thoughts, questions, anger, and hurt.

[br0k3np0rc3lain]

7 hours ago, hemogoblin said:

This isn't a question anyone can answer for you. Maybe you're one or the other, maybe you're both, maybe you're both right now but might not be later and/or haven't always been both.

Here is what makes someone aromantic:

• They feel aromantic is a useful label for them, and/or
• They want to ID as aromantic and/or they take comfort in ID'ing as aromantic

Regardless, it sounds like taking a break from dating and just focusing on you and your healing would be a good way to sort through your thoughts, questions, anger, and hurt.

Okay. My bad. Sorry.

[br0k3np0rc3lain]

9 hours ago, hemogoblin said:

This isn't a question anyone can answer for you. Maybe you're one or the other, maybe you're both, maybe you're both right now but might not be later and/or haven't always been both.

Here is what makes someone aromantic:

• They feel aromantic is a useful label for them, and/or
• They want to ID as aromantic and/or they take comfort in ID'ing as aromantic

Regardless, it sounds like taking a break from dating and just focusing on you and your healing would be a good way to sort through your thoughts, questions, anger, and hurt.

Didn't mean to make you mad.

[hemogoblin]

3 hours ago, br0k3np0rc3lain said:

Didn't mean to make you mad.

I'm not mad, and you don't need to apologize. You asked a question, and I tried to answer for you. I'm not sure where the disconnect is coming from? But if you're just feeling bad interacting with me, I can certainly bow out and leave you alone so you can feel safe.

[DeltaAro]

18 hours ago, br0k3np0rc3lain said:

I've always had relationship problems. All of my past relationship have been short and toxic.

I only had ONE relationship, which was short and extremely toxic.

18 hours ago, br0k3np0rc3lain said:

I'm always getting rejected. Nobody seems to love me. 

Don't take this personally.

While I support the freedom and choices of people who feel romantic attraction, I still personally believe that romantic attraction is more shallow than platonic attraction.

Anyway, your value as a person is not determined by being romantically (or sexually) attractive.

Also, there's love beyond "romantic love".

18 hours ago, br0k3np0rc3lain said:

Am I on the aroace spectrum or am I just mad that nobody will ever want me?

There's no aro-meter that can measure your aromanticism. Does aromanticism "click" with you or not?