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Someone told me that I could be aromantic and now I'm confused

Guest page28


Guest page28

Hello, I'm very confused since someone told me I might be aromantic I can't stop thinking about it, sorry about my English 

So, all my life  romance was very important to me, I used to daydream about me marrying or dating someone, I've never been in a relationship but I've flirted with men on Instagram and I really liked that, I used to spend all day waiting for them to text me, and I could imagine me going out with them, on the beach and etc, I thought about me posting a picture or video of us on Instagram and all my friends and family sees it, I had a best friend in highschool that i thought he was beautiful so I started talking to him, we loved to listen to Taylor swift together play video games and etc, at one point I didn't felt anything for him anymore, but there was a year where I used to listen to love songs and think about him, I watched the movie lovie Rosie and think about us, I remember when he started to date and I felt so jealous and angry that I deleted all of our photos.

And I've always had some feelings towards women that idk what this could mean.

I had a teacher that I thought was so pretty and so interesting and everytime she talked to me I immediately blushed, I couldn't look at her, when I was seated next to her I felt so nervous, I wanted her to notice me.

There was a friend of mine back in school,that I thought was really beautiful too, I felt nervous around her and I couldn't talk to her like I talked to my other friends, I remember when I arrived at school and it was just her and me I felt really nervous, then one day, I was playing video games on my phone and my hair fell on my face, then she put her hand on my face to put my hair behind my ear, I immediately blushed and it was like the world stopped for a second.

In highschool there was this girl that I couldn't stop looking at her,I wanted to impress her, I wanted her to look and me and notice me, in a room full of people I could still feel her presence, I had dreams about her.

But I've never thought about doing something romantic with them, since I thought I was straight and that all women felt that way, so for me it was normal 

Last year I was in a restaurant and a woman so beautiful (imo) sat next to me and I felt really nervous, I started to fix my hair and my posture, I remember looking at her and she was looking me back and I looked away from being nervous, until this day I remember her hair, her clothes, her voice, what she said, I was pretty depressive at the time and I remember going back home so happy and energized, I wanted to go out again, to have a relationship.

I have celebrities crush, like really crush, I think about me with them, and I feel desire.

I really want a girlfriend, like really really, I can imagine me kissing a woman and hugging her, and I feel so much desire.

The problem is, whenever someone asked me out I didn't go, I felt anxious and nervous, and I didn't, I really wanted to.

But since this person told me that,I can't stop thinking about it, someone told me about cupioromantic and now I'm panicking.

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People can say what they want about you but what matters is what you feel. I don't know exactly what romantic attractions are like, but what you're describing could be that (but I don't know honestly)

I'm not saying you're not aromantic, but from what I have seen so far (my experience and some others), learning that one is aromantic is mainly a relief, not something panicking. It's a relief because finding a word to describe what you've felt for your whole life makes you feel better about yourself, makes you see that you're not alone and you don't have a problem. Even if I didn't like the idea of being aro at all at first, it was still a relief for me. So I don't know but that's something to think about.

And being anxious about going out with someone doesn't mean you're aro (especially if you actually really want to go out with them, some/many aros don't want to go on a date at all, or they force themselves to go)


But I think the most important is that you try to think about what you feel, and not what people say about you


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