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how do i ask her to be in a QPR?


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so there’s this friend i’ve had for nearly 4 years now, and recently i’ve been kind of getting feelings for her? im pretty sure they’re not romantic, but like, i don’t know… i really wanna be in a QPR with her but i’m not sure how to initiate one…


she knows i’m aroace, and she’s a bi ace, but i’m not really sure how familiar she is with the idea of a QPR or whatnot. we’ve been super close with each other over the long time we’ve been friends, but recently she’s been starting to kind of act like she likes me (inviting me to hang out more often, “joke” flirting?, talking about sharing an apartment in college, asking if we’ll be each others valentines ) 


i’m completely fine with all of this, i actually could see myself living/being with her in the future, i just don’t know where to draw the line on if she actually LIKES me that way or not since we’re so close…we’ve joke flirted for a while, but it just has been feeling a little more serious lately.


i kinda wanna ask her to be my QPP on valentine’s day, but i don’t really know how to casually bring it up and explain it without it just feeling awkward 😭 even though she’s ace, she doesn’t really know much at all about the aspec community and QPRs and all that stuff. i’m not worried about her rejecting me or anything at this point, because we know each other so well that i’m sure neither of us would get upset over it…just not sure how to approach the matter?


(we’re 16 if that’s relevant at all to the situation)

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Ime anytime you try to avoid something as natural as awkwardness, you're just going to create more of it. I gently encourage you to accept the awkwardness and lean into it. You can even acknowledge the awkwardness, which can help it lessen because the two of you will relax knowing it's a bit odd for the both of you. It'll probably be awkward! That's okay! It'll pass! Y'all are friends, and you're so close that you know your relationship can withstand a potential rejection here. A little awkwardness certainly isn't going to take it down.

Good luck!

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