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Hiw do I know I'm ace


Guest Anonymous

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This paragraph won't make since because it's rambled Honestly at the end of the day it doesn't matter because my dream life is alone with no kids in a tiny apartment but...

 

How do I know I'm asexual it's obviously a spectrum but people are born aroace I wasn't k grew in what if my ADHD  medicine causes it I have literally no clue maybe I'm just aro I mean I don't have crushes what if I just haven't hit that stage of puberty yet how do I know I'm asexual if I still get false alarms how do I know it's a false alarm sure it's not triggered by people most the time but if I imagine it happens is that a biological response maybe I'm just sex repulsed by still ace I literally don't know  

How the actually hellokitty do I know

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The first thing is that aromantic and asexual are two different things. You can be both, you can be one of them, and you can be neither. 

Then, you're the one that decides. If you want to have a label, you can take it. Everything is a spectrum, but if you just want to consider yourself as aroace because it's more simple, just do it ! Finding yourself takes time.

It doesn't matter if you're aromantic/asexual because of a special reason or not. You still are. And even if consider yourself as aro/ace now, that doesn't mean you have to be all your life. Things change. 

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Life is fluid. Life is flexible. Life is full of stages.

You do not have to know that you are aromantic or asexual "naturally" or impacted by medications.

You do not have to know that you are aromantic or asexual without neurodivergence impacting your thought processes and view of the world.

You do not have to know that you will be aromantic or asexual for the rest of your life.

There is no age restriction on identity.

Ask yourself this: is aromantic/asexual a useful term for me now? Not tomorrow, not in two years, not in ten years, not in fifty years. Is aromantic/asexual a useful term for you now? Does it help communicate with others what your current feelings/experiences are? Do you want to ID as aromantic/asexual? Do you relate to the experiences of others who identify as aromantic/asexual?

If you answered yes to just any one of those questions, then you can be aromantic/asexual!

Nobody really knows. Even if you know in the moment, that doesn't mean things can't change down the road, such as after you receive treatment for a neurodivergency or after accepting yourself as trans or going through a traumatic experience. Nothing is for sure forever. All you can do is judge based on your current thoughts, feelings, and experiences. If something changes down the road and you want to change labels (for whatever reason at all), you're allowed to! No harm, no foul. Thus is life. In fact, honestly, it's good for people to every now and then take stock of themselves and make sure they're still happy/comfortable with themselves.

Edited by hemogoblin
left out an important word
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On 2/12/2023 at 3:10 PM, hemogoblin said:

Ask yourself this: is aromantic/asexual a useful term for me now? Not tomorrow, not in two years, not in ten years, not in fifty years. Is aromantic/asexual a useful term for you now? Does it help communicate with others what your current feelings/experiences are? Do you want to ID as aromantic/asexual? Do you relate to the experiences of others who identify as aromantic/asexual?

If you answered yes to any of those questions, then you can be aromantic/asexual!

THIS!!!

You don't have to be 100% sure to use a label that makes you feel comfortable. And if down the line it no longer fits, that's okay. If it's useful now, use it.

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