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Aros who experience romantic attraction, what is it like for you?


dewy

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As the definition of aro is little to no romantic attraction, and there are many arospec identities, some of which experience romantic attraction, I was wondering how the experience of romantic attraction is for those of us that do have it.

As for me, what I experience it is hardly there. I'm not even sure I could call it romantic attraction. It's just "hmm this person might be fun to date", but I don't feel strongly about it. I would be equally as happy to remain friends. Before finding out I was aro I would also have fantasies about doing romantic things with them. I haven't dated or had a strong crush after finding out I was aro though, so I'm not sure how the experience would be.

Edited by bat
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I am still not sure on how to define romantic attraction, and there is only one person I've been attracted to romantically: my best friend of seven years and current partner. I would define it as needing them in your life, wanting to know everything about them, take care of them and spend years by their side, cuddle, make them happy... The thing is that this definition could be applied to a lot of different feelings, not only to r. attraction. Sorry if this is not very helpful.

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For me, I rarely experience romantic attraction. I have had two definite instances of it. I have one person I have felt feelings for for a few years now, and I used to ID as demiromantic because of it. I still consider myself to have feelings for her, but I don't really desire a romantic relationship with her, or at least not anymore. 

I have had that feeling of "this person might be fun to date" on rare occasions, too, but with no desire to actually date.

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I felt it once in middle school yeaaaaars ago, and from what I remember, it was this very blushy, "gotta look cool gotta always impress this fella" feeling? Like I would short circuit any time we hung out and I was p much like "pretty boy I want to be around so much hes so pretty and cool"

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for me, as a quoiromantic guy, i cant tell if its a romantic moment or platonic but…

when i was younger i was very close with a girl in my yeargroup and we hung out all the time, and i always wanted to be close with her. i felt really soft and and just nice around her, and i felt fluttery when we were physically close. it was great!

then again, i do feel that way with anyone im close to, but im sure it was romantic… probably.

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