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Questioning Myself


Guest imconfused
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Guest imconfused

Recently I'm questioning myself if I'm on the aromantic spectrum. 

 

I know aromantic is people who experiences little or no romantic attraction to others, but the problem is I don't even know whether what I felt/have been feeling is romantic attraction or not.

Well, when I was in high school I had 3-4 crushes, but now that I think of it, they were never anything serious. Like, I think they have a good look and blushing when I saw them but never want to pursue or be in romantic relationship with them. The only time that thing became serious is with my ex. We did like holding hands, cuddling, making out and stuffs. But things happened and so we broke up and became good friend.

Now I'm in romantic relationship, but I have no desire for anything romantic-coded and also feel uncomfortable doing so, even in private. I don't think it's necessary too, like, just spending time with them, doing funny things and supporting each other is more than enough. I feel like they love me more than I love them, and I feel as if I'm just a selfish person. I still like the concept of romance though, still like shipping and imagine myself with fictional character, but I don't really want any romantic things in real life.

Also something like 'list of romantic things to do with partner' always make me feel... weird (even when I was still with my ex) Like, okay if you really want to do it then I could try I guess? But I couldn't see myself be the one who suggest or enthusiastic about it. Some of them (i.e. stargazing or cooking dinner or walk with them on the beach) I have no problem doing with my friends though, but when others expect it to be "romantic" I'm kinda like... enjoy it less?

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9 hours ago, Guest imconfused said:

I know aromantic is people who experiences little or no romantic attraction to others, but the problem is I don't even know whether what I felt/have been feeling is romantic attraction or not.

I believe that if you’re wondering if you feel romantic attraction or not, you do not. It’s too strong, too obvious, too unique.

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