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Squishes experience


Haze
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Hello!

I strongly suspect I have a squish on someone but i'm still not sure yet so i've been curious about what were your experiences with squishes (Especially online one, if you had one where you couldn't meet with your squish). How did you know it was a squish and not just another friendship (if you were friend with the person) ? Did you ever felt jealous (toward a romantic partner or a close friend of them?)? Did you want to get over the squish if the other person didn't really reciprocated the feeling or were you satisfied with your current friendship ? Or anything you want to tell, I'm interested to hear about it ! 

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I've only experienced squishes a handful of times, but this is what I can answer of your questions.

How did I know it was a squish and not just another friendship? 

> For me, it's kind of a more urgent draw to be friends with the person. I guess the feeling is best described as "This person is wonderful and it matters to me that they want to be friends with me too"? (And with this, a sensation of "if this person tried to initiate hand-holding or cuddles, I would happily accept")

Did I ever feel jealous?

>Not really? I get sad if said squish doesn't have time for me and hurt if they end up being closer friends with someone who's mean/aggressive towards me, but I'm not really jealous by nature.

Did I want to get over it?

>Um... well, back when I initially mistook these feels for crushes? YES. Because it hurt and I didn't understand why and the people in question barely even acknowledged me as existing. Once I found out that "squish" was a thing? It kind of made it okay that the feels I have don't really go away, they just diminish once the person stops being around me and then are stored in the back of my brain for reference. 

Granted, I have never been in a position where I told someone that I had acquired squish-feels for them, because for the longest time I assumed it was crush-feels (and I'm really romance repulsed and couldn't risk the possibility of ending up in a relationship with them)... and then because I'd rather have them as a friend that I consider special than to potentially mess things up or encourage them to acquire crush-feels for me.

 

Another note: I sort of imprint like a duckling on people (especially teachers/professionals in my field) who validate my existence or abilities in general. Like "wait, you're being genuinely encouraging and validating and nice? I will live up to your approval if it's the last thing I do and follow you to the ends of the earth as your squire." Kind of squish-adjacent, I guess? 

 

I have no idea if any of that was helpful for you, but that's what I've figured out of my own experience.

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Oh, maybe I've been using the term too lightly? I kind of use it for anyone I want to befriend to so... Every friendship has a squish. Then again, I don't tend to feel that drive mildly. Either I'm daydreaming about friendship with someone, or I don't care about them more than the average stranger. 

It's rare for me to get jealous over people. Definitely not a squish requirement. 

If someone didn't reciprocate then yes, I would like to get over the feeling as soon as possible. Interestingly, I'm more okay with unrequited romantic feelings, in the rare event that those happen. 

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