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Looking for my terminology


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I'm new to this board, so hopefully this is an acceptable topic...


I'm a person who puts an irrational amount of importance on having the correct terminology... I get annoyed at times when there ISN'T a good term for something... and when it comes to myself, I guess it's more so than most... 


I'm not sure what "romantic attraction is" (check one). I've thought I've had crushes in the past, but I think that they were just physical attraction. I've kind of always assumed that a "relationship" is just "friendship" + sex, and so I kind of always assumed that the reason that FWB was looked down upon was that the "friendship" part wasn't REALLY there... (check two?) I know I'm not asexual, so FWB seems like a really cool setup... but it has this weird baggage associated with the term...

I've really only been in MAYBE one "Relationship" (6 months). It ended because I was totally incapable of giving what she needed, and that made me feel guilty... (check three?)

Because I always assumed that physical affection was always associated with romantic affection, I've had very few physical relationships either... 

I'm 46, so when I say "only been in one relationship" that means something different..... 

Like I said, I'm not asexual, but the way this culture looks at non-romantic sexual relationships is really harsh... I'm not sure if there's anything to be done about that... 

So, is this aro? Grey? some other term? Is it mostly "you're aro if you think you're aro"? 


Also, has anyone done a study on the relationship between what flag you find most aesthetically pleasing and what group you identify with? Because I definitely find the aro flag most pleasing... B-)

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in short, yes, you're aro if you think you're aro.  but i will say that your experiences sound quite similar to mine.  i'm 21, but i think if i were ever going to experience romantic attraction it would have happened by now.  but if it does happen in the future, then ok, i'm gray or demi or whatever.  but i don't think so.  and i don't think there's much to be done about others' opinions of certain relationships or orientations; i just don't worry about them.  oh, and the aro flag is nice enough but i wouldn't say it's my favourite.  still got serious aro pride, though. :aropride:

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