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raavenb2619

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About raavenb2619

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  • Name
    raavenb2619
  • Orientation
    Aro
  • Gender
    Non-binary
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    They/them

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  1. Here is my submission: https://raavenb2619.wordpress.com/2020/03/31/musings-on-my-aromanticism-and-gender/
  2. Right now, most queer organizations have little to no resources or information on aromanticism. Seeing as how Aromantic Spectrum Awareness Week is coming up, I think it would be great to see positive coverage during ASAW, kind of like how multiple queer organizations (and even CNN) had some coverage about Asexuality Awareness Week this past October. Unfortunately, I don't know how to go about making this happen (and even if I did, I don't have the time or energy). Should this be handled by AUREA? Individual aros? Have I overlooked something that would make this a bad idea?
  3. This is probably the post I was thinking of, and I misremembered so much that it’s not super relevant to the conversation, but it be like that sometimes. (kudos to @Coyote for finding it)
  4. Oh, okay. I thought that meant that you didn’t get squishes on strangers you’d literally never interacted with, but no matter. In that case, the difference in how we think about and describe this might simply come down to the fact that the idea of squishes is/was super important and helpful for understanding myself, and for whatever reason, it is less so for you. (Like I said before, one big figuring-things-out moment was when I realized what I thought were crushes were actually squishes.) Yes. I suppose if you wanted to be pedantic you could say my alterous attraction
  5. That's fair. I only half noticed the sleepovers the first time, and probably rationalized it as "having an excuse to do a thing that friends like to do some times" to make it fit with how read the rest of the original post. I get why you want to do that, but I also think it kind of...doesn't matter? In the sense, I guess, that I've had an inherently subjective experience reading through the posts, and I don't think the OP's intentions have much bearing on it either way. Whether or not the additions are in the spirit of the OP won't really change how I read through it. (Which is
  6. I get what you're saying, but I think we might be describing different things. I've definitely had at least one (small) squish where me and this other person were on opposite sides of a large room with a bunch of other people and for whatever reason they caught my eye and I felt like they were a cool person? I didn't interact with them in any way, and considering that I ended up leaving the room after about half an hour and never saw them again, it's entirely possible that they didn't ever know I existed because there was literally no interaction, and yet, small squish. There are definitely sq
  7. Yep. Quick recap, I use platonic attraction/squish to refer to when, for no discernible reason, someone I’ve never met seems super cool and I want to be friends with them. I also use platonic attraction/squish to refer to when I want to spend more time with a close friend (and sometimes go from being comfortable with platonic and physical affection to sometimes wanting to initiate it). I use alterous attraction to refer to when I have a specific feeling of attraction that’s neither platonic or romantic. It’s involved some of the stereotypical infatuation associated with romantic crushes, but h
  8. Sorry, I guess I should clarify. The way I read the original post was two mischievous aros who, among other things, "got married because it gave us an excuse to ask for toasters from people as wedding gifts", but not necessarily as two aros who were in a QPR or some sort of Named Important Relationship (TM). Which isn't to say that the aros in question couldn't be, only that I read it as two aros that decided to get married primarily to get the benefits married people get. There isn't anything wrong with posts about QPRs, and posts about QPRs and nonromantic marriage don't have to use the term
  9. Yeah, it felt like it went from aros playfully hijacking the institution of marriage to aros conforming to it. And it kind of felt to me like it was saying the latter was better/more virtuous than the former.
  10. Reviving this thread again because I found this post on Tumblr, I’m curious if other people read it the same way I do (my thoughts are in the last reblog) or differently
  11. Not really. It might have been titled something like "the case against arospec" and went through three or four reasons why arospec was a bad term. I think it made reference to ace community politics, probably talking about how people used various terms like "ace", "asexual", "acespec", maybe "ace umbrella", and noticed that since something about policing language or making graysexuals and other """non-gold star asexuals""" feel unwelcome or second class had happened, it was likely to happen in the aro community and that using arospec would facilitate that bad thing. It might have been som
  12. No worries, my explanation is a poor substitute for the actual article/writing. I tried to find it, but I can't. @Coyote, do you know what I'm talking about? I think it was a Tumblr user, and I think you linked to them either in the body of one of your Wordpress articles, or in the comments. IIRC the page had a mostly black background, and pointed out 3 or 4 issues with using "arospec" that the aro community would likely run into in the near future, based on what had already happened within the ace community with a different umbrella-ish word. (Or it might have been problems that the aro commu
  13. The definition of alterous is...complicated, from what I can tell. Everyone is talking about vaguely the same thing, but the minute details can make a big difference. I prefer this definition because it avoids describing it as “between” platonic and romantic, whereas “between” can suggest a hierarchy of romantic > alterous > platonic. I don’t want a qpr, but non-alterous doesn’t really resonate with me, because I have on occasion experienced alterous attraction (and also, when I did, it didn’t make me want some kind of relationship). One thing I can’t tell, are you using
  14. I also use arospec as synonymous with “anyone falling under the aro umbrella in some way”. However, I remember reading some writing somewhere about how the asexual community uses “ace” and not “acespec” as their umbrella shorthand, and for similar reasons the aromantic community should use “aro” and not “arospec”, so I’d like to revisit that and reconsider its reasons. (My explanation is poorly worded and makes it sound like the main argument was “aces did x so aros should do x” but that’s not what it was. This also gets complicated with the whole “aspec” is/isn’t a synonym to “acespec” and it
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