Unsure of myself

[Guest AnonAmphibian]

This has been happening for a bit now and I want to see if there’s an exact term or if other people feel similar to how I feel. I’m an AFAB and I don’t connect with it at all. I’ve felt both trans and non-binary at the same time, fluctuating between more one than the other. Another thing that confuses me is that I enjoy dressing like a “femboy” in private but I HATE being called a girl. It’s all so confusing, thanks in advance.
I’ve never done this before (posting online, I mean) and I’m sorry if I’m doing this in the wrong place, I just felt like I needed to ask people who know more about LGBTQ than my friends or family.

[eddie]

I feel exactly like this too :)

I think it'd just be called a femboy....? If you identify as a trans guy/enby, it doesn't change your gender to like wearing feminine clothing (Unless it's more than just wearing clothing to you?). If a cis guy wears a dress, they're still a guy. They're just wearing a dress. If you like wearing feminine clothing, that's fine. Just be yourself. You liking that clothing doesn't make you a girl and it's okay to not like being called one. Idk if there's a separate term, but I'm pretty sure you'd still just be a femboy?

I love wearing pink and crop tops and even dresses occasionally, but I am NOT a girl. One of the reasons it took so long for me to find out I was a trans guy was because I didn't know boys could wear that stuff if that makes sense? But I am trans. I am a boy. I am not a girl. So I guess "femboy" would be the right term <3

Let me know if this was helpful :D

[Kristoph]

I think you wanted to say "trans man and nonbinary" and not "trans and nonbinary" – speaking in general, being nonbinary does fall under the "trans" umbrella. Also, experiencing being of both (man and nonbinary) or feeling that your gender fluctuates, isn't anything new. You may be bigender (bigender means two genders, not necessarily two binary – it can be a binary gender and nonbinary) and/or genderfluid – I recommend reading a little, so you'll find the right label for you.

It's completely normal that it makes you uncomfortable when they call you a "woman" or a "girl", because you just aren't one. You should dress what you like and trust me, there are other trans men and male-aligned nonbinary people who do wear clothes that are seen as "feminine" (when will cisgender people understand that clothes doesn't equal gender? Never, I suppose).

[Guest AnonAmphibian]

On 5/21/2024 at 9:24 PM, eddie said:

I feel exactly like this too :)

I think it'd just be called a femboy....? If you identify as a trans guy/enby, it doesn't change your gender to like wearing feminine clothing (Unless it's more than just wearing clothing to you?). If a cis guy wears a dress, they're still a guy. They're just wearing a dress. If you like wearing feminine clothing, that's fine. Just be yourself. You liking that clothing doesn't make you a girl and it's okay to not like being called one. Idk if there's a separate term, but I'm pretty sure you'd still just be a femboy?

I love wearing pink and crop tops and even dresses occasionally, but I am NOT a girl. One of the reasons it took so long for me to find out I was a trans guy was because I didn't know boys could wear that stuff if that makes sense? But I am trans. I am a boy. I am not a girl. So I guess "femboy" would be the right term <3

Let me know if this was helpful :D

Thank you so much! This was very helpful to me :)

[eddie]

On 5/26/2024 at 9:21 PM, Guest AnonAmphibian said:

Thank you so much! This was very helpful to me :)

No problem!! :)