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Coming out on my b-day?


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My birthday is tomorrow and I think I might come out to my siblings (or just one) as agender. My brother says he will get me something off Amazon and I found a necklace that show the agender symbol. I want it but if I ask my brother for it he will see the listing and know. I kinda want to tell him but based on what happened when I came out as aroace (I did that way too early btw 🥲) idk if I should. I could get something aroace themed but I don't have any agender things and I don't want my brother to think I'm weird getting pride things or that I'm making it my whole personality. I just have no idea if I should come out or maybe just reject the offer entirely.

When I came out the reactions were mixed, they said 'ok', 'you can't love?', 'I've heard of that!', 'Isn't that one youtuber like that?', it was odd. The one thats gonna get me smth was ok about it but I still don't know. Once, I said smth about growing up with two older brothers made me act like a guy and I kinda made a joke about how it's their fault my family thinks I'm weird for not being girly. I forgot exactly what I said but I said something about tomboy and eventually they started joking about how I 'might be trans' or 'they have another brother'. The way they said it made me feel like they don't like trans people. My younger older brother (the second child) has made a lot of transphobic joke and I can't even tell if he's serious. My older is better but still, I don't know if I can trust them with my information. I'm oddly really scared.

Sorry for the rant and probably my longest post.

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Happy birthday!!! 🎂🎈🎁

My personal advice is to avoid big scary emotional things with potential negative consequences like coming out on important days/days with positive connotations to you (like a birthday might have). You just don't need that stress on a day that's supposed to be about celebrating you. I would save it for a more neutral time in general.

Come out when you want and when it feels right to you. You got this.

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