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Primary vs Secondary Romantic Attraction


Emmy
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So I’ve recently delved into the idea that I am probably Demi-romantic, but I still want to explore and discover more about it in order to be sure this is how I feel. I’ve tried searching on Google, but as I think Demi-Romanticism is relatively new(please correct me if I am not), there weren’t many very helpful websites. It’s all about Demi-sexualism, however I am not demisexual. I was wondering if anyone knew the difference between Primary and Secondary romantic attraction is, and the difference in what each one feels like. I really appreciate all the help I can get. 

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Primary romantic attraction is what most people feel. I think crushes could count as primary romantic attraction, someone could develop a crush right away or after spending some time with someone. Secondary would be, imo, the deeper love that comes later on in a relationship, after you know someone on a deep, deep level. So most people experience both primary and secondary romantic attraction, imo.
A demiromantic person wouldn't have that initial crush, but would develop that deeper love that comes from knowing someone on a deep level.

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Hey Reengo. Thank you so much for replying, I enjoyed reading through it, however while I think I may be Demi romantic, I am most definitely not Demi sexual. It took a while to understand the difference between them for me, and my sexual attraction has caused many sleepless night of trying to figure myself out. Part of the reason that having a normal sex drive, personally for me higher than normal sex drive, made it so hard was because I would develop these “crushes” on people that I thought were beautiful. I wanted to hold their hands, kiss them, have them notice me, and to hold them in elementary school. But beyond that, I didn’t want anything else from them. I always thought that was a crush. I mean, what is a crush? For me, it’s always been that, but someone once told me part of that “crush” was wanted to spend the rest of their life together? I have no idea if that’s true or just them. I think that’s just were I struggle the most, being Demi-romantic but also having a high sex drive and attraction really begins to blur the lines of what a crush is. Sometimes I feel really close to a person, and I get nervous around them, but I never really knew if it’s just my hyper sexuality or the actual connection I crave from being a Demi-romantic 

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