waywardson Posted September 1, 2018 Share Posted September 1, 2018 You can probably guess where this post is going, I've been questioning aromanticism all summer. I've had a few relationships (online, anyways) but with each one I'm slightly more disenchanted with the reality of romance. I'm attracted to men, sure, but all the love I've felt is platonic. I say "I love you" with the same emotion and meaning I do to my friends that I would my boyfriend. Sometimes I don't know when romantic phrases are more than metaphors, sometimes I only know what romantic things to say if someone says them first. What spurred all my questions, you ask. Well, I was at a convention this summer. At that convention, a cosplayer on a panel mentioned that they were aromantic with casualty and for some reason I realized that was an option. I've had a lot of run-ins with the label in the past, often even id'ing with it but ultimately forgetting, so I don't know why I had this reaction. I'm honestly not sure what I'm looking for in making this post, any advice would be appreciated. Thanks for listening. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
aro_elise Posted September 1, 2018 Share Posted September 1, 2018 i kept dismissing the possibility at first, too, until i...couldn't. i know (for me, at least) sexual attraction makes it hard to discover your romantic orientation because you just assume it matches. but here's something to think about: i thought 'how do i know whether i experience romantic attraction if i don't know what it is?' well, that fact should be a pretty good indicator in itself. if i had felt it, i'd know. 'but what i just haven't YET?' well, i was 16/17 then and i'm 20 now and most importantly, i truly have a feeling i never will, but even if i do, my aromanticism up until that point is valid. i was with my boyfriend for 8 months, great guy, we're still friends, but everything romantic...it felt like i was playing a part for which i hadn't prepared, and i thought i just had to get used to it but i never did. i cried with nothing but relief (and a bit of sympathy for him) when we broke up. i hope that helps and i'd be glad to try if you have any questions. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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