Emmy Posted April 4, 2022 Share Posted April 4, 2022 Hello! I've recently discovered the possibility that I might be along the spectrum of Asexuality, specifically demi-romanticism. The more I began to think about what it was like growing up, the more things made sense. But honestly, I've been having a lot of trouble accepting what I am stating to believe is a part of me. Growing up, I never desired a relationship with anyone in my school, which was fairly large, nor did I ever develop a crush. It was never that I didn't want one, I very much wanted one, the kind of romance that you see on TV and in my parents. Every year, I would always try and look to see who I thought I wanted to date, but always came up dry. However, when I went to the local fair with my best friend, whom I known for 1 year now and someone that I had no interest in whatsoever, I had decided to sneak a picture of her. I remember looking at the picture I took and seeing my friend's smile, which she never does, and then I noticed just how nice she looked in that moment, and a sudden fuzzy feeling. I even wondered why I never noticed that before. Now I've been someone who has constantly craved strong connection with everyone I meet, and all the signs and everything add up, but I find myself wanted to find any other label. It also doesn't help that I've never had anything noticeably different with my sexual attraction, if anything my sex drive is doing more than just fine. I think that growing up in a society where a romance that sweeps us all off our feet has been so ingrained into us makes accepting my demi-sexuality the hardest part. Knowing that I'll never experience the spark of finding "the one" out in the wild and that it could take months to years to ever want someone for life is terrifying. Hook-up culture is everywhere, and no one is ever interested in waiting for someone to get feelings when their already knee deep. Afterall, by the time it actually happens for me, they'll have moved on to the next girl. I can't make someone wait for me. I am not even sure if anyone else has felt this too. I think I am just hoping that someone out there knows how I feel and that I am not alone. So here I am, shooting my shot. 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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