Darkraven77

My guy friend told me he's sad because he broke up with his girlfriend.

3 hours ago, kira- said:

when my whole class is talking abt their celebrity crushes (which make zero sense)

My professor made us imagine us dating Chris Hemsworth or Jennifer Fox as a thought exercise.

My brother was talking about how he used to buy this pretty girl coffee when he went to my school. He would always pay for the dates and didn't like when women would pay for the dates. I was like I don't understand but okay.

My professor was like imagine dealing with the grief of your married partner dying and I was like hmm how am I supposed to imagine this with something else... I thought about asking him what the non-romantic version of this would be but I decided not to because I feel like him and my class would think I'm weird.

Most people I met don't really get it.

5 hours ago, organs and bone said:

thanks both :))

 

No problem

Dancing with Myself by Billy Idol

Miss You Love by Silverchair

On My Own by Three Days Grace

Freak by Silverchair

My professor was mentioning having a first crush and how everyone has them because of a book that mentioned this story how this Chinese girl fell in love with the minister's son who was white and I was like no, not me with a confused look on my face.

3 minutes ago, Helion said:

I don't mind elaborating, just saying, this might not be the case at all, I don't know about your particular feelings!

But who you are romantically or sexually attracted to can change, actually. Both of those kinds of feelings develop particularly during puberty, which is a gradual process, not just a "click, you are bisexual now!". During puberty you are developping, so it isn't that unlikely that you can change your sexual or romantic orientation as you develop.

For instance, I am pretty sure I was alloromantic, I can't be 100% sure ofc, but I do remember fairly vividly having a big crush on a guy at the age of 13. Since the age of 14-16 I believe I developped to be aromantic and started lacking romantic attraction completely. 

This kinda stuff can just happen during puberty, it's when your body goes through a looot of changes and your hormones just go crazy. 

It's not impossible to change your sexual or romantic preferences after puberty, though it's much rarer and from my personal experience it tends to not happen for no reason, but is tied to events like for example trauma. 

Just as a suggestion, maybe that is what you are experiencing! If not, I totally agree with all the other great comments here.

Hmm okay got it.

On 12/28/2023 at 10:54 PM, Helion said:

"Once" sounds like it has been in the past. This might not be the case, but I wouldn't exclude the possibility that you just changed and became aromantic. This sort of happened to me, I am pretty sure I was alloromantic as a young teenager, but sort of just became aro from around the age of 15-16 onwards, perhaps earlier, I can't be too sure. Romantic and sexual attraction can very much change, usually if you are a teenager because that is when your preferences are developping and your hormones are going bonkers.

Explain because I'm confused right now?

Oh okay. More like getting to know them. I've had romantic thoughts but that didn't go anywhere.

What kind of crush?

So, I would see this guy at my college who is very good-looking and I get nervous around him and I blush and get excited and I would think about him a little bit but I don't think that I feel romantic attraction towards it or if it is romantic attraction and I'm lying to myself. I'm confused. Any advice here?

I'm 20. How would that be possible?

On 12/31/2023 at 9:23 PM, MondoBilby said:

It's mostly just because they were treating their relationship like they'd been together for years right as it started that made it feel so short-lasting. Seriously, the amount of drama that happened was bloody tiring. I won't get into it though to respect my friend, and also because I just don't really care lol. It was crazy though, I'll say that.

Lol, so me XD

Oh and I forgot to mention my relative thinks that my other cousin is going to get married after she graduates college.

How did you get a qpr? What is being in one like? What should you expect?

45 minutes ago, MondoBilby said:

Haha, that's exactly what one of my friends did! He got a gf for the first time, not even a week went by and they were already planning their engagement and what they'd do for a honeymoon and such. Very long story short, they're not together anymore lol. Only lasted about 8 months.

Wow well that's something!

18 minutes ago, Holmbo said:

By this I assume your aro movie is about an Estonian mobility company that offers ride hailing, micromobility, rental, food and grocery delivery. Sounds exciting!

The days of canine superstar Bolt (John Travolta) are filled with danger and intrigue ... until the cameras stop rolling. But Bolt doesn't know that he's on a TV show; he thinks his amazing powers are real. When Bolt is accidentally shipped from his Hollywood soundstage to the mean streets of New York, he begins his most amazing adventure: Armed only with his delusions and accompanied by a cat and a hamster, he sets out to to find his owner, Penny (Miley Cyrus).

Bolt.

I've never had heartbreak before. I'm glad I don't feel it.

9 hours ago, SkyTuneRein said:

Story of my life, being left behind. I think that others think others, like themselves, will find their dedicated partners and all and even be happy, not least if they think it'll be as easy as it was for them. Yet for many of us aromantics and even demiromantics, this is much less the case as so many of our what-were-for-life-friends become almost unavailable as they sail off with their spouses. Or is the pluralistic spice? I dunno...the alc is messing with my cognition. I hope that makes sense.

Ah good old heteronormativity. I don't get why having a partner is so important to them?

5 minutes ago, AroAcedragon13 said:

I get being tired of romance. its exhausting. im shocked that ppl actually plan/think about their weddings in high school.

Omg they do?

I've gotten hormonal over boys a few times and had an urge to kiss someone once.

2 hours ago, MondoBilby said:

Oof, I feel ya. My best friend has a partner now, and even though he still makes an effort to hang out with me I still feel like things have changed. I guess it's because his friendship is so important to me, but to allos romance is usually the "higher tier" in relationships. I know he still cares about me, and I'm super happy for him because his mental health has improved so much since getting a partner, but I also get the occasional thought like "I wasn't enough to make you feel better? You had to get a partner to not be depressed anymore?" It sounds selfish, so I try not to think like that, but it's still a lingering feeling.

Sorry for the rant, I just relate to this a lot. I also don't really understand romance.

Yeah, it's been repeating in my head since yesterday. Atleast I'm not alone. I hate heteronormativity.

All of my cousins are dating and one of them is getting married. Kind of tired of romance being everywhere. I don't get it and I never will.