ConfusedWindbag

9 hours ago, the more the merrier said:

Welcome! All of this can be very difficult to process, and it's okay if everything feels strange, especially when it's all so new. One idea would be to give this time. Your experiences are ones that many of us share. You certainly could be aromantic and/or a-spec! As you may have read, however, only you can answer this. It's not an ideal answer, yet if you find an orientation in the future which feels right, it may well feel fantastic for you soon.

Uncertainty can be a wonderful state, even if it feels so hard. I very much appreciate that your present orientation is written as a question mark. I wish to be open as your "?".

It's such a sublime time to be questioning. Yet with so many resources, it can also feel overwhelming - where do you begin? Pepper your friend with questions, and ask us as many as you wish to. Give your mind a breather, or plentiful ones, whenever you need one. Float around this forum and let your resting mind cross-pollinate ideas for you. You don't have to quest through all of these ideas alone. We are here to support you. I just know that you will find answers which are just for you, and I can't wait to read more of your thoughts, if you wish to share more with us here. We are with you!

Thank you. It certainly feels odd having something I never thought about become a huge unknown. I guess the hard part for me is I’m someone that likes to have somewhat concrete answers and at the present time I’m so unsure that finding one is a long way out but I’m glad I found somewhere like this that I can try to learn from to maybe find those answers.

Hi there. I’m doing this on a throwaway just incase anyone I know comes on hereI’m currently having a bit of an odd time. My whole life I’ve never considered being anything other than straight. A few days back me and a friend who is Aromantic and Asexual were having a chat and part way though they asked me if I was sure I was straight. This felt odd but I was curious as to why so I asked them to explain why. Then through the rest of the conversation they gave me a couple questions and by the end they put it out there that maybe I was Aro. I thought this was unlikely as I’d never really thought about it and was pretty sure I’d been romantically attracted to people.

In the days since I’ve been looking into it more and now when looking back I’m not sure if I have been romantically attracted to someone. I’ve only been in a relationship once and I was never that comfortable in it, I had just assumed it was the person I was with. Most times I remember being attracted to someone seems more like I just misinterpreted being really good friends with them when looking back. I’ve never been someone to pursue relationships, my reason had always been not wanting to go out of my way because I just didn’t feel ready for a relationship but I can’t work out I would need in my life to feel ready. Ive always felt weddings are weird, just an odd public shout of look at my love so I’ve never really been interested in getting married. I’ve even been trying to understand what romantic attraction is supposed to feel like to know if I have felt it and I just don’t know. I’ve been reading various sources and sites trying to understand if  I am and I see a fair few similarities but I’m just not sure maybe I’m not Aro or maybe the sudden explanation of a lot of things is just difficult to process.
 

I apologise if this become sort of a ramble, I just feel the need to get my thoughts out there to people that may be able to tell me yes or no. My head has been a little messy while trying to understand this whole situation. It feels better with it being strangers because there’s no bias and people are more likely to be straight up with me. To anyone that’s taken their time to read this, thank you for your time