Sili

Welcome fellow middle aged aro (40 here)

Creating a secure website - Software

On 3/30/2024 at 3:09 PM, DeltaAro said:

Stellaris Wiki?

That one was XCOM2 - I was making notes.

[[Specialist]]

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On 3/28/2024 at 4:21 AM, algebraicresc said:

(Maybe that’s a sign that I’m aro haha). 

I think thats very much part of it. Quite a few Aro people dont quite understand what the difference is. However, having been in a few romantic relationships, I can attest that the /other/ person can tell the difference. A *very* common comment from my partners was that it felt like I was "play acting" being in a relationship. I was doing things because I thought that whats you did, not because I felt the need to do them - but I didnt (and still dont) know the difference. I just know that I apparently dont feel the thing they feel.

On 3/28/2024 at 4:21 AM, algebraicresc said:

at some point I might try having a romantic relationship just to see what it’s like, since I’ve never been in one before.

Also a very Aro thing to say fyi

Q: What does the Aro person say?

A: Well, theres 16 now, but 3 flew off, 1 exploded and 18 decided nah

So its funny, but the advice for this is the same advice you would give if someone wanted to ask someone else out and was worried about it runing the friendship (or something similar).

Talk to them about it

Whats the alternative? You dont talk to them, you never get any closer, she ends up getting upset because she thinks you're stringing her along or worse, you do start dating but she gets upset because she finds out you dont think of it that way or you end up feeling trapped doing romantic stuff you dont want to do. Whats the worst that comes from talking to her? You come to the decision you both want different stuff and stay friends.

So, relativly recently I remembered something. I must have been around 8 at most (probably younger), and I had kinda realised that it was normal for couples to form and marry. So, a little bit worried that I would have to find a girl to marry I asked my parents if /everyone/ gets married when they grow up.

My parents explained that no, not everyone needs to get married, and lots of people never get married, which made me feel better.

Could not start the machine Arch because the following physical network interfaces were not found:

Realtek PCIe GbE Family Controller (adapter 2)

You can either change the machine's network settings or stop the machine.

Not sure why thats copied - I know what was happening and the reason for it, I didnt need to copy the error message

6 hours ago, Nix said:

One of my friends send a picture of a muddy jeans-clad leg to the group chat. Another friend responded with ‘?’ To which she responded ‘No? Nobody an idea? It’s my boyfriends knee, he got it dirty.’
And I responded with ‘Oh did he hurt himself?’

And then the chat exploded.

…

(Ooooh ok he asked you to marry him, yeah ok cool cool)

Glad you clarified that, as I didnt see what it got dirty for

On 3/17/2024 at 3:48 PM, DeltaAro said:

Great, I'm very impressed! For me, starting to code in CSS was the uncomfortable moment where all my previous programming experience was null and void.

I think that CSS in reality means "Check your superiority, you actually suck".

Oh, and if someone says it's not real programming, show them that.

CSS + HTML is Turing-complete! 😄

This is very much me - I /hate/ HTML and CSS - Really dont understand them and avoid as much as possible.

1 hour ago, Nix said:

I’m pretty sure the DX stands for ‘Deluxe’. Nintendo did that way back with a couple of Gameboy games that got a remaster for the Gameboy color.

I guess this version has some extra options and/or content then?

From my understanding thats exactly what it is. If you enjoyed the original you would likely enjoy DX, as its the same game with extra stuff, better graphics etc.

On 4/13/2022 at 4:20 PM, Sili said:

Stellaris. Its always stellaris.

So as much as its always Stellaris (and it is), updates include Age of Wonders 4 (trying to get a life/necromancer kind of thing going), and wingspan.

Wingspan is really cool actually, its just a computerised version of a real life board game, so you can play against AI opponents. Its a nice relaxing game, in which you can learn about birds. Highly recomemended for anyone that enjoys board games, or anyone that enjoys engine builder games.

Any Saturday or Sunday evening should be fine for me, would love to attend. Saturdays are slightly better, but not by much.

Yeah, I get it, probably quite a few round here thought that

My house looks great!

Small Gods, coming off the Witcher books.

May?

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236

I am offended that you only replied with one word. That doesnt even explain why you're offended!

On 2/20/2024 at 5:34 PM, Armored frog said:

i didnt really realize i was aro, as much as i realized everyone else wasnt, i always assumed atraction was something you would unlock when you turned 18 or whatever. when i found out that wasnt the case i just thought, neet, im probably aro-ace then. 

ive never had any internal problems with beeing aromantic, its just having to explain it to others that suck, especially when they hit you with the "but it might change"

I love the idea of attraction unlocking, like a level up. - You hit Level 18, Romance Unlocked! Round 2 - Dating!

"No, that doesnt mean you're Aro, because I do that and i'm not aro.... wait... Shit."

So, im going to start this by saying the only person that can decide whether you are somewhere on the aro spectrum is you. Having said that, wanting to do things that are romantically coded (kissing, holding hands etc) is not an indicater of anything really, other than you enjoy those things. A lot of what you have said could apply to me. I have had several relationships where I assumed I was in love with the other person, because they were a good freind and I was sexually attracted to them, and that means romance right? After talking to alloromantic people, apparently not, apparently being romantically in love is something different. You know all those songs people write about being in love? Apparently they come from experience and arent exaggerated. That was news to me.

I have enjoyed dates, but I have enjoyed them in the same way I enjoy hanging out with other friends. Its just we did different things, it just didnt really feel that different. I wouldnt mind having someone to settle down with, but mainly thats because being able to split the bills and chores would be nice, plus sex is nice. Overall, "settling down" would be fine I guess, its not a priority for me and never has been.

I am fast approching 40, and realistically if I had been born 20 or 30 years before I was I probably would never have found out I was Aro. There was no real reason to believe I was anything other than a heterosexual white male. But when people talked about being in love, or when I heard one of those songs describing it, it never really resonated. I never knew what they were talking about. Then I read some of the experiences of Aro people, and they did resonate. At one point when reading someones experience I found myself thinking "That doesnt mean you're aromantic, because I do that, and i'm not!" Then I caught myself, and started wondering if maybe, just maybe I was wrong and they were right. Maybe the experience they were talking about that I could relate to could mean I might be aromantic.

I enjoy romantically coded actions. I enjoy a good love story. My favourite anime/manga is one called Oh My Goddess, which is literally a love story. I like going on dates. I have had relationships in which I was quite happy. I have literally no idea what people are talking about when they describe being in love.

I hope that helps.

Well, that this as an Aro thing, but I forgot which day the 14th was - going to have work so wont be there. For some reason I had it in my head 14th was Tuesday